Awen looked up from the oven as she took the pan of fresh muffins out as Matt entered the kitchen. She eyed him for a moment, as she sat the muffin pan on the stove and holding it with the covered hand, began plucking the muffins out to place them on a plate, to cool. "Saffron okay?" She asked, not letting on that she'd heard bits and pieces of things upstairs.

Matt smirked softly as he went to the coffee pot and poured a cup. "Yeah. Managed to sleep the rest of the night. Had a bit of a rough spot this morning, but... I think he'll be okay now. Thanks." he said softly. He took a long drink, the hot brew burning down his throat, but he didn’t mind. "Any word from dad?" he asked after a moment. 

Awen shook her head, grabbing her own cup. "Not yet, but give him a little more time." She replied calmly. "Had a visitor last night, no worries, I took care of him. Also, Landan left another present, but I got rid of that as well. Looks like he's trying to scare Saffron bad enough, he'll run from you..."

"He won't run from me." Matt said softly. "But this is crazy... I'm not putting him at risk of finding this shit. It's only a matter of time." he sighed heavily, listening to the faint sound of the shower running. "I need to get him out of here. Some place safe where the bastard won't think to look."

Awen sipped on her coffee, considering. "Well...you could...take him back to Chaos Inc..." She suggested. "Or any one of my safe houses...Or one of da's places, but those are in Europe and we all know you hate it there..." She said as they heard the shower shut off.

Matt sighed, taking another drink of coffee, his gaze going to the doorway. "He won't go to Chaos Inc... he freaks every time I suggest it. Your places are... just fucking scary..." he said with a slightly wicked smirk. "I... I want him safe, Awen. I don’t give a shit about anything else. I want him safe."

Awen snorted softly, shaking her head slightly. "If you want to keep him safe, you can either stay here with him, while I take care of Landan's lackies, or take him to da's place in Ireland, it's the only one Landan doesn't know about..." She said softly. There was soft footsteps coming from the bathroom.

"Ireland..." Matt growled softly, his tone almost bordering on a whine. "Would have to be fucking Ireland... " he added in an even softer grumble, then sighed. "Fine... but I'm only going because of Saffron..." he added in a decided pout as he glanced back at the door just before it started to open. "Come on in, angel." he called out.

Awen snorted softly. "That's simply because Landan knows about the house in France and England. Besides...those are in the city, the one in Ireland is in the country..." She answered, glancing at the door as Saffron entered hesitantly. The skirt was loose, but short to knees and Awen would have personally loved to find the black velvet peasant blouse. His damp hair was braided, though a few strands still lay in his face. He'd heard some of what they were saying as he'd reached the kitchen. "Ireland...?" He asked in a whisper.

Matt smiled softly, trying shove away his gloom, and held out a hand to Saffron. "Yeah... Awen says we can go crash at my dad's place for a bit. Landan can't bother us there." he said simply. "Oh yeah... Saffron... this is my sister Awen... Awen.. Saffron."

"Morning." Awen said cheerfully.

Saffron blushed slightly, "Hi..." He answered, he still wasn't really hungry but coffee was definitely looking tempting. "It’s just...I was born in Ireland..." He answered Matt softly. "Not that Landan knows that...I just...haven't been there since...I was a child..."

"Oh.." Matt said softly catching hold of Saffron's hand and pulling him closer. "If you don't want to go there... we can brave Awen's place... " he suggested, letting his fingers slip between Saffron's a moment. "You hungry yet? "

"I really don't think I could eat..." Saffron replied softly.

"You should...it was a long night for you after all." Awen said from leaning against the counter.

Saffron blushed more, but shook his head, then answered Matt. "No...Ireland's fine...really...just... like I said...haven't been there in a very long time..." He said softly.

"Alright. Come on... At least have a coffee and muffin with me..." Matt said, his hand holding Saffron's lightly, enjoying the simple gesture. "Awen made them... She maybe a slob but she's actually a pretty good baker... Not a bad cook either.."

Awen snorted. "A slob... as if you have much room to talk, Mattias..." She replied softly, but was smirking faintly.

Saffron was forced to smile faintly himself before sighing. "While the coffee sounds good to me, not sure about the muffin." He said softly.

"Have half a muffin." Awen said, grabbing on and slicing it, before putting it on a plate. She was hardly surprised to see the way Matt was with Saffron...considering.

Matt gave Saffron’s hand a gentle squeeze. "Please eat a bit, Saffron." he said softly, ignoring his sister as he leaned down to brush his lips over Saffron’s cheek. "Please." he repeated, then let go of him to take down a second cup and pour him some coffee, then topped off his own mug.

Saffron hesitated a moment, eyeing the muffin half Awen sat down next to the second cup of coffee on the counter, before he sighed softly. "Alright..." She said softly, agreeing to try at least. "Shall I go make arrangements for Ireland then?" Awen asked.

"Yeah... thanks." Matt said with a soft smirk to Awen, then snatched a muffin for himself. "You take anything in your coffee, angel?" he asked Saffron around a mouthful of muffin.

Saffron shook his head. "No...black is just fine..." He said softly, before taking the half a muffin. Awen had slipped from the kitchen to make her calls. Saffron fell quiet a moment, before looking at Matt. "Have you ever been to Ireland?" He asked softly.

Matt carried his coffee and a second muffin to the table then returned to get Saffron’s as well. He pulled out a chair and nodded to it with a soft smirk. "Come and sit with me." he said, taking his own seat and patting the empty chair. "No… well... yeah but I didn't stay.. just passed through briefly. Awen will tell you.. I don’t like Europe. England's the worst.. fucking HATE England... "

Saffron moved away from the counter and took a seat at the table next to Matt. "Why?" He asked softly as he picked up the cup of coffee, curious more then anything. He still moved and sat like a girl, Awen didn't fail to notice that as she came back in, taking in the way Saffron was sitting at the table. She supposed if anything, she should be surprised by how comfortable her brother was with that.

 "Everything's ready, the house cleaner is cleaning the place up and getting it ready. So when ever you two are ready to go, I'll open a rift for you." Awen said, grabbing another muffin.

Matt looked over at his sister and gave a weak smirk. "Thanks. Let me have breakfast, get dressed... and pack some things, alright? I may need to run in town and get my prescription filled if I don’t have enough..." he added a bit more quietly. He looked back at Saffron and gave him a weak smirk and shrug. "Too many spooks." he said simply.

Saffron blinked, curious but not sure he should ask more. "Sure...maybe you should check on that." Awen said. "You have enough clothes, Saffron?" She asked him. Saffron blushed, but nodded, finally making himself eat some of the muffin. It really was a good muffin. "Well, Matt knows how to charge any thing to da's bank account, so if you need any more." Awen said with a slight smirk. "But really, Matt...you know things around Da's place are...quiet...its why he picked there..." Awen said a bit more seriously.

"Yeah I know. Just figured I'd be prepared." he answered simply, sounded a bit distracted and a touch gloomy still. "You want to tag along to help keep an eye out, we can pick Saffron up some stuff in town before we go. That way, I can use my own money... "

Awen smirked. "Yeah, sure... I'll just take Saffron shopping and we'll see if we can't max out YOUR account." she said.

Saffron snorted faintly and shook his head. "I think... I'll be fine...I really don't need anything else..." He said softly.

"Hun...if you're going to Ireland this time of year, you're at least gonna need longer skirts." Awen said and Saffron blushed at that.

"And sweaters." Matt added. "And better shoes. The heels look great on you and all, but you'll need something else besides them. Plus there's shit like shampoo and all that crap. I doubt me or dad have stuff you'll like..." he said softly. "And I'll take him shopping... you just play lookout. No fucking way am I letting you near my card."

Awen laughed at that. "You're just afraid of what I could talk him into buying..." She replied with a smirk, seeing Saffron blush even more.

"I suppose I really should have considered more of my boots then..." saffron said after a moment, a slight smirk coming to him. Then he remembered about his apartment and sighed. "If they're even still there...probably nothing but ash now..." He added.

"Where's your apartment?" Awen asked. "While you guys are finishing breakfast and Matt's packing, I can go by there..." Awen offered. Saffron bit his lip, considering.

"No." Matt said simply, his attention on his second muffin. "Landan's been there... nothing else from that place is coming near Saffron now... who knows what he might have done to it. I'll buy him new stuff."

"So you made sure to get out all the important things?" Awen asked softly.

"Everything meant something to me...but I did take the things that were very important to me..." Saffron said softly. "And thankfully, Matt let me bring my posters...all my money is in those..." He added.

"You mean the old classic horror posters..." Awen said, nodding toward the front room. Saffron nodded. "Those are all originals are they?" She asked. Saffron nodded again. Awen snorted softly. "Never thought I'd meet any one who liked London After Midnight." Awen said about the old Lon Cheney movie.

Saffron blushed. "It was the first horror movie I ever saw...It was...actually the first MOVIE I ever saw..." He replied. "LiVed...would send me on jobs...here in the mortal realm.. .and I was on a job in London...in the middle of the night. I had two hours...before I'd be collected to go back to the Black Court...and found an old theatre...that was still showing movies. I hid there...rather then...killing the family LiVed wanted me to...that was the movie they were showing. It scared me...the movie, but...it also...awed me...and somehow... Right punishing me for four days after wards, didn't seem so bad... when I could think about the movie..." Saffron said softly as he stared at his coffee cup.

Matt reached out and rubbed his hand over Saffron’s back gently, not sure what to say. He knew talking about his past probably was painful for Saffron... and hearing it only made him angrier and want to track down those who'd hurt him. Finally he just leaned over and kissed Saffron’s forehead softly. "Drink your coffee, sweetheart. I'll go get dressed and toss some things together then we can pop in town.."

"Wait...I'm sorry, but... you were punished for four days for not killing a family?" Awen replied softly.

Saffron snorted softly, and gave a faint weary smile. "I'd be punished for a lot less...but yus...that's what LiVed had me do...kill people who pissed him off. And Major Right...was in charge of my punishment. I was supposed to be a girl...so Major Right used me like one..." Saffron was half shocked at himself for still talking, and giving out so much detail about his past, he never had...except with Shane and Corey. Shane had been the only other person to get him to reveal so much about himself in such a short time of knowing him. Saffron shifted, pulling up the sleeves of his top, revealing the scars on his wrists. "He'd bind my wrists, with a leather belt behind my back every time...I'm actually...terrified of leather belts..." He said, blushing darkly at admitting that. "Unfortunately Landan learned that rather quickly...he might not have used leather belts, but he thought it was kinky to tie me to the headboard...so I suppose now I'm terrified of being tied up period." He said, still talking softly. Awen let him talk, not about to tell him to stop if Saffron felt the need to talk about it. "Death elementals aren't supposed to scar, but I suppose Major Right used his belt so much...so many times a day..." Saffron muttered. Then suddenly jerked his sleeves down and looked away. "Rin was the only person in the Black Court that...was kind to me. He was my tutor...he taught me to read and such...and how to use my swords. And when I was sixteen...he did my wings to hide my scars...and I...foolishly...thought I was in love with him..." Saffron suddenly clamped a hand over his mouth and scrambled out of his chair, leaving the kitchen.

Matt heard a sharp crack and felt a stab of pain, and looked down to see he'd squeezed his mug so hard he'd broken it. He carefully set the broken pieces on the table and pulled a rather large piece out of his hand, not saying anything. He wanted to hit something, break something... yell... The thought of anyone hurting Saffron like that... the knowledge that his own brother had enjoyed causing more pain... He stood, walking to the sink and running water over his hand before wrapping a cloth around the cut. "I'm going to kill Landan. And I'm going to take my time and enjoy it." he said softly, his voice cold before he headed after Saffron.

"We know..." Awen muttered softly as Matt left the kitchen. She sighed and moved to pick up the pieces off the table and trash them, then removed her cell phone, calling Vivi her secretary to see if she'd had any luck tracking down the cop and his boyfriend Saffron had lived with.

~ ~

Saffron had headed back up stairs rather quickly, considering he couldn't go outside...he didn't dare. He pulled his hair out of the braid running his fingers through his hair which had dried, though it was more wavy then normal, since it dried in the braid. He wandered over to the window, still confused. He'd told them parts of his past that were the hardest...and confessed to Matt he'd once thought he was in love with Rin...but it did explain why he'd freaked out last night as seeing Rin. And yet, what ever he once felt for Rin was nothing for what he'd come to feel for Matt and he'd only known him since yesterday morning...He some how knew he was falling in love with Matt...if he wasn't already in love with him. He looked out the window, finding a calming peace just looking at the cemetery outside.

Matt climbed the stairs slowly, trying to get his anger under control. When he saw Saffron standing at the window, he just walked to him and pulled him into his arms. "It's over now. No one will ever hurt you like that again. I promise." he said softly, then kissed his forehead softly and let him go. Without another word, he headed to his wardrobe and dug out his belts. One was so old and worn he'd meant to throw it out anyhow. The others were newer; one a plain simple dark brown leather and the other black with a scene burned into it that was barely discernable against the black. Without a second thought he carried them to the small trash bin by the bed side table and dropped them in.

Saffron had turned from the window when Matt had walked away. He watched him and winced at the sight of the belts, but blinked in surprise as Matt tossed them in the trash. Saffron blinked a bit confused, hesitating a moment, before taking a step away from the window. "You...you didn't have to... throw them away..." He said softly, hesitantly. He chewed on his bottom lip, long and hard enough to make it bleed, before speaking again. "I'm sorry, Matt... I don't... know why I kept talking. I've never really...spoke so much about my past like that...I just... couldn't stop talking. And...about Rin...I was...young...and foolish... and I threw myself at him one night...but he... rejected me...and told me I was meant for another man..." Saffron said softly, blushing, but moved sitting down on the edge of the bed.

Matt just sat beside him and slipped his arm around him, pulling him against his side. "It's alright. You can talk about it all you need to. It just ... pisses me off that they hurt you like that." he added, squeezing the cloth tightly in his fist. "Makes me want to go find them and hurt them back." he added then sighed softly. "And I threw them out because... I want you to understand... I'm nothing like Landan. I will never use your fears against you. I will never do shit like that to hurt you. You're safe with me, Saffron. "

Saffron was quiet a moment, leaning against Matt's side. "Maybe...with you... I could over come that fear...and you could... keep your belts..." He said softly. He turned enough to lean up and kiss Matt's cheek. He fell quiet a moment, before feeling there was something else he had to say to Matt. "Matt...I don't want you to take this the wrong way... but...if...if I'm going to be your... girlfriend you have to understand something about me.  I was raised a slave...and...after that...I...I was a prostitute... And you know that...Landan was keeping me... Its just that...there's a part of me that's...that's much more comfortable...and...happy in a sad twisted way... by being dominated...Claimed by some one..." He said rather softly, blushing.

Matt let his good hand rub over Saffron's arm as he held him, digesting that bit of news. "Dominated and claimed... but not abused or hurt... right?" he asked softly. "I can't hurt you, Saffron... even if you want me to... I can't do it." he said.

Saffron shook his head. "Prefer not being abused and hurt...but...yus...dominated and claimed." He answered softly, still blushing. "I'm just...it's...the slave in me...I don't think that can ever be broken in me...It took Shane months to understand that...I was happiest dominated...it was hard for him and he was merely a big brother...The only family I've ever had...him and Corey..."

Matt  pulled him tighter against his side and rested his cheek against the top of his head. "I can do that. I tend to be rather domineering anyhow.... it's just part of my charming nature." he said with a smirk. "But I'll never hurt you... so please never ask..." he added.

Saffron sighed softly, but found himself a bit more relaxed, knowing Matt wasn't… put off by him telling him about needing to be dominated. He snorted softly, "I don't think I could ever ask you to hurt me, Matt... besides...I can hurt myself...and usually do if I'm feeling that kind of need..." He muttered softly.

"Don't." Matt said softly. "I don’t want you hurt, Saffron. " he said then used his cloth wrapped hand to tip Saffron’s chin up and kissed him. "I never want you to hurt.."

Saffron didn't answer, instead he let his eyes close and found himself kissing Matt back. He found himself wanting more then just a soft simple kiss and kissed Matt more hungrily, moving to lean up closer, his arms slipping around Matt's neck. The move put him on his knees, beside him on the bed and he leaned against Matt, deepening the kiss more still. He realized while kissing Matt, he'd never wanted any one like he wanted Matt, a small crazy part of him tempted to move again and either straddle Matt's lap in the skirt or slip down on the floor between his knees and rather wished they were alone. The rest of him felt shocked he was even thinking that right now...even though he had the feeling that when they were alone he'd most likely try seducing Matt again.

Matt moaned into the kiss, his hand slipping into Saffron's hair, tangling in the thick waves as he let himself fall into the kiss completely.

Saffron couldn't help it, he moved again while still kissing Matt passionately. He moved the skirt enough to make the move easier, slipped off the bed and coming to kneel on the floor before Matt. His hands slipped from around Matt's neck and caressed down his bare chest, one fingering the piercing for a moment, as the other drifted lower and before Matt could stop him, slipped inside the boxers.

Matt's breath caught in his throat, escaping in a deep moan at the feel of Saffron’s fingers wrapping around him. "Saff..." he breathed softly, his own hand covering Saffron’s through the silk. He opened his mouth  but couldn't find any words to say. Instead he just leaned forward and kissed his again, one hand holding Saffron’s where it lay.

Saffron let Matt kiss him, a soft whimper escaping him, closing his eyes for a moment before focusing what he'd started, his fingers wrapping around the length of Matt for a moment, before he began to stroke him slowly and gently. He couldn't help but notice Matt was certainly bigger then Landan was, that thought making Saffron blush a bit darkly, but he didn't stop, breaking the kiss for a breath of air, before leaning forward enough to nuzzle Matt's neck.

Matt's eyes drifted closed a moment as he let himself enjoy Saffron's attention, then he opened with a soft smile. "Get up, angel." he said softly, pulling Saffron up off of his knees. He slid his hands over Saffron’s hips, pulling him back up onto the edge of the mattress until he was straddling him, Matt's hands on his thighs beneath the skirt. "That's better." he whispered softly, kissing him again. He slipped a hand down to catch Saffron’s and guide it back inside the boxer shorts, before returning to its own place beneath Saffron’s skirt. "Much better..." he added softly.

Saffron blushed more, but found himself leaning in again to nuzzle and kiss Matt's neck, wondering why he didn't feel the sudden need to slip back to the floor on his knees, but he was comfortable enough to be where he was. His hand continued to stroke and caress Matt, even as he felt him harden more, his thumb circled around the tip slowly, almost teasingly and Saffron was suddenly blushing even darker as he felt himself getting turned on.

Matt let his eyes close again, enjoying the feel of Saffron's lips on his neck almost as much as the rest. His own hands rubbed over the bare thighs beneath the skirt, then slipped over Saffron’s hips to caress his backside, moaning as he found it bare, with only the thin lacey band of a thong to say he wore anything at all. With another soft moan, Matt gave Saffron’s back side a gentle squeeze, turning his face enough to kiss his neck.

Saffron whimpered, squirming slightly. He squeezed the length of him gently a moment, before pulling back enough to look Matt in the eyes, his own a lighter hazier dark green. "Let me, Matt...please..." He whimpered softly, begging, before slipping off his lap again, back to his knees and freed Matt from the boxers, hesitating a moment before his lips took the place of his fingers.

Matt moaned softly, his head falling back in sheer bliss as Saffron's mouth moved over him. "Oh gods... " he whispered softly. He braced one hand one the bed slightly behind him and slipped the other one through Saffron’s hair, holding him but not forcing. "Oh fuck yes... don’t stop..."

Saffron brushed his lips over the length of him and down the other side before kissing the tip. He hesitated a moment, before he let his tongue lick, circling around the tip, then down the length of him and slowly began taking him in his mouth. He moaned softly as he took as much of him in his mouth as he could, sucking gently and looked up at Matt through his lashes. It was the first time he wanted to do this for a man, not mad to. He wanted to please Matt.

Swallowing past another soft moan, Matt rubbed his fingers through Saffron’s hair, then looked down at him. The sight of him looking back up brought another moan form him. "You're so beautiful, angel... so fucking amazing... "

Saffron blushed but didn't stop, nor could he look away. He realized it was the first time any one had said something like that when Saffron was doing this. He whimpered softly, but increased his attentions, letting the length of Matt slowly glide in and out of his mouth as he both licked and sucked gently. In the back of his mind he fervently hoped Awen wouldn’t bother them for just a little longer.

Matt didn't bother trying to hold back the orgasm he felt building already. He stroked his fingers over Saffron’s head, tangling in his hair as he watched him. The sight only combined with the death chill to make the moment even more intense, and he finally had to slip his other hand through Saffron's hair as well, holding his head cradled in both hands. "Saffron... angel.." he whispered breathless.

Saffron looked up at him again, pulling out all the stops to make him cum. He wanted much more, but as long as Matt was enjoying himself, that was enough for Saffron right now. He had the thought in the back of his mind that if Landan was pissed at the idea of Saffron talking to Matt...let alone running away with him, he'd be absolutely furious if he knew what Saffron was doing at the moment...and enjoying it...not to mention wanting so much more.

Matt had to close his eyes, his fingers tightening in Saffron’s hair as he felt himself getting close. "Oh gods..." he whispered. "I love you, baby..." he added, then cried out as his orgasm hit him, his abilities almost slipping from his control at the power surge.

Saffron took everything he could, before pulling away with a gasp, sitting back on his knees and watched Matt a moment. He was trying to decide if he'd heard Matt correctly or not when he'd said he loved him. The idea made his heart beat hard and fast, wanting it to be true. He blushed, realizing what he'd just done. "I'm sorry...I'm not usually so bold..." He whispered.

Matt smiled softly wanting to laugh but not having the energy. Instead he held out his hand. "Gods don't apologize..." he said simply. "Come here, sweetheart..."

Saffron hesitated before moving, taking his hand and sliding on to the bed beside him. "Sorry...its a habit for me to apologize so much..." He said softly, blushing. "One I'll find hard to break I imagine..."

Matt smirked softly and lay back, pulling Saffron with him, their legs dangling over the edge of the bed. He held him, stroking his cheek lightly. "You stole my heart away... you know that right?" he said softly. "And I don't mean with that.... incredible blow job. Although... if you hadn't already had my heart,,, that probably wouldn't done it.." he added with an embarrassed smirk.

Saffron blushed even more, but found himself snuggled against Matt. He turned slightly, on his side, laying against him, rather glad he was in a skirt. He couldn't deny he was still turned on by Matt, but he'd worry about that later. He took a breath, before looking up at him. "I suppose...it’s a good thing...that you feel that way..." He whispered.

Matt smiled softly as he rolled onto his side to face him, kissing him softly before agreeing. "A very good thing..." he said, then took hold of the rather delicate looking amethyst pendent from around his neck and pulled it off. With another kiss he slipped it over Saffron’s head and  then pulled his hair free of the chain and let the pendant fall against his chest. "I think it's only right that my girl friend should where my amulet..." he said softly, his hand slipping down to Saffron’s waist and pulling him closer. With a slight blush he felt Saffron’s arousal. "Guess I should do something about that..." he said softly, rubbing against him lightly.

Saffron blushed, he'd been looking at the phoenix amulet, about to reply about that, when Matt rubbed lightly against him and a soft whimpered moan escaped Saffron, his eyes drifting closed. "If...if you want to...but you...don't have to..." He managed to answer in a whisper.

Matt smiled softly, kissing him lightly. "I want you, Saff." he whispered softly. "I want all of you..." he added with another kiss, his hands slipping beneath the skirt and taking hold of the thin bit of nothing that served as underwear and sliding it off. "Kiss me for a minute or two and let me recover fully..." he whispered huskily, reaching up to catch hold of Saffron’s hand and slipping  it back inside the boxers.

Saffron's heart was back to beating fast and hard and he looked at him for a moment, a pleasurable shiver rushing through him at the feel of Matt's hands under his skirt. A soft whimper escaped him, before he leaned forward kissing Matt, deep and passionate, his hand slipping inside the boxers again, letting his fingers brush light and flutteringly.

Matt moaned into the kiss, his hands stroking and roaming lightly, no longer caring if Awen heard them. Part of him was tempted to yell at her to go take a walk, but the rest of him just couldn't be bothered. It was his house after all. Her ears were good enough she'd figure out what was happening and get the hint.

Another pleasurable shiver slipped through Saffron, and he moaned softly, letting his fingers stroke a little more as he kissed him. The moment seemed completely unrealistic, and far more tender then he could ever remember a moment in bed being like, but he didn't want it to stop. He didn't want Matt to stop...

Matt kissed him harder pressing him back onto the bed. He pushed his boxers out of the way, freeing his erection as he pressed against Saffron's, rubbing against him lightly. With another kiss, he slipped his hand beneath the black velvet of Saffron shirt, stroking his stomach. "Take this off..." he said softly, still rubbing his body against Saffron’s lightly.

Saffron bit his lip, hesitating before moving enough to pull the peasant blouse off, letting it fall on the bed above them. Then reached down, squirming enough under Matt that he was able to pull the skirt up around his waist and rather glad he'd worn one of the lace thongs instead of boylegs. The stockings were the same as last night, thigh highs that stayed up on their own. And while he'd pulled the skirt around his waist, the black rose of his belly button piercing was still visible. As was the knife scars on his inner thighs, the memento from the night Landan found out he was really a boy...

Matt continued to kiss Saffron as he wriggled free his shirt and pulled the skirt out of the way. He let his hands stroked over his skin, caressing lovingly as he kissed him. Part of him wanted to take his time and explore every inch of Saffron, but another part just wanted him. He ground his hips against him, moaning at the his own move. "Gods baby...." he whispered softly. "Shall I bring you like this, this time?" he asked, kissing his way down Saffron’s neck. "Or do you want more...?"

Saffron moaned softly, his hands caressing over Matt's chest, fingering the nipple ring a moment. He wasn't sure he wanted to explain the scars on his thighs, but at the same time, he wanted Matt...he wanted to feel him inside him. "Is it...wicked of me...for wanting more...?" He asked breathily, tilting his head back as Matt kissed his neck. And was very glad Landan never learned about the spot behind Saffron's ears that drove him crazy.

"No... no more then it is for me to want more too...." Matt said softly as he continued to kiss his way along Saffron’s neck. "Only know the one way to do this though...." he said softly, his lips reaching Saffron’s ear and continuing behind it. "And I'll lose those fabulous lips of yours... and I won’t get to watch you... I love looking down and seeing those incredible eyes of yours looking back..." he whispered, nuzzling. "Makes me wish you were a girl for real so I could have you that way and never loose the eyes watching me..."

Saffron moaned wantonly as Matt hit that magic spot and he arched up against him, his fingers slipping to Matt's shoulders, his nails scratching slightly. "Matt..." He moaned softly, "You...you can... do it that way..." He managed breathlessly. "Or let me lean over the end of the bed..." Maybe Matt would be too distracted to see the scars just yet.

"I can still have those beautiful eyes on me while I fuck you?" he asked softly, the feel of Saffron’s finger nails against his skin sending a delicious shiver through him. He pulled back enough to catch Saffron’s mouth with his own, kissing him hungrily as his hands slipped between then, stroking and teasing as he rubbed against him. "The angle's wrong baby... I'll end up hurting you..."

Saffron moved a hand, his fingers coming to rest on Matt's lips, silencing him for a moment, looking up at him. "You won’t, Matt..." He whispered softly, slipping his fingers from Matt's lips to brush his cheek, before slipping his fingers into his hair. "You won’t hurt me..." He whispered again. He knew considering Matt's size that it might actually hurt physically, but it would either way. But he some how knew it'd never be the way it would with the men in the past, who hadn't cared about Saffron's comfort at all. He leaned up, kissing Matt, deep but tender. "Please Matt...I want you...I want to feel you inside me..." He whispered behind the kiss, wondering if he was blushing.

Matt moaned softly at that, kissing him harder. "Then help me make it best for you... " he said softly, one hand slipping beneath them to stroke along sensitive skin  until his fingers brushed over what he was looking for. Kissing Saffron’s neck again, he gently eased a finger inside him.

Saffron moaned, his eyes fluttering closed as he arched slightly against Matt, pushing back a bit against his finger. He moved his legs bending his knees, his feet resting on the bed, and managed to reach above them, just managing to grab the edge of a pillow and yanked it to him. He squirmed enough, managing to put pillow under his rear end, which put him at a some what more comfortable height.

Matt had pulled back enough to let Saffron move, but kept his fingers stroking inside him. He let his other hand run over him, feeling the slight ridges of what he knew must be scars as his fingers stroked over Saffron’s inner thighs. He was tempted to look but stopped himself, not wanting to become distracted. As Saffron settle himself, still moving against his hand and whimpering in pleasure, Matt finally pulled his fingers free and pressed his erection against him. Watching Saffron’s face, his gaze locked on those beautiful deep eyes, he pressed forward until he pushed inside, the tightness bringing a groan of pleasure/pain.

Saffron gasped sharply, one hand clutching at the blankets under him, twisting them in his fist. The other was still on Matt's shoulder and his nails dug a bit sharply as he arched against Matt. The slight pain only lasted a moment before his body adjusted to Matt and he moaned softly, an intense pleasure replacing the pain. It'd never felt this way before. It felt so much more intense and so very right and after a moment, Saffron managed to open his eyes, looking up at Matt, the dark green lighter then they had been, hazy with desire.

Matt saw the desire and pleasure in Saffron’s eyes and felt a wash of relief go through him at not seeing the pain he'd been sure would be there. Leaning down he kissed him, easing in more before pulling back. He'd never felt anything so amazing; tight and hot with the chill power of death all mixed in... he didn't think he'd last much longer then he had when Saffron had gone down on him.

If there was any lasting pain from Matt's size, it was lost in the intense pleasure and Saffron wouldn't worry about it right now. If he ended up sore after words, then it would be well worth it. And eventually his body would get used to Matt's. He let go of the blankets, to slip both hands around Matt's shoulders as he kissed him back, moaning softly behind the kiss. His body began to move with Matt's, bringing another moan and his nails drew across Matt's shoulders lightly in long strokes as he could already feel the orgasm building intensly, unlike he'd ever felt before.

Mat gave a slight whimper as he kissed him harder at the feel of Saffron's nails, his breathing already coming in ragged gasps. "Fuck... angel... I'm already close... you feel just too good..." he whispered softly as he continued to move. "When you can't take any more... just use those wonderful fingernails... scratch me and I'll cum... I'm that close... and you feel that good..."

Saffron moaned at hearing that, but really couldn't form a cohesive thought to reply. He moved his legs, rather then get a cramp in the bent knees and his legs wrapped around Matt's hips, allowing Matt to sink deeper with his thrusts. "Never...never so...good..." He managed in a whimpered moan, barely moving from the kiss, his lips brushing over Matt's cheek. He moved enough to kiss Matt's neck, his breath coming more ragged and gasps as the orgasm grew closer. And the words escaped him before he had time to think about it. "Keep me as your lover, Matt...I don't want to be any one else’s...I...I love you..."

"Always, angel" Matt said softly, his heart lifting at those words. "I love you too... I never want to share you." he added. "Anyone dares touch you... I'll fucking kill them…" he added with a breathless chuckle, then gave a low moan. "Oh fuck... baby... " he whispered, kissing him again.

Saffron gave fully into the kiss a moment, before pulling back with a gasp, his eyes fluttering closed. A second later, his nails dug into Matt's shoulders as he arched against him, "Matt!" He gave a soft cry as he came, the orgasm far more intense then he'd ever experienced, his body tightening around Matt. He knew when Landan learned Saffron had given himself to Matt... willingly, Landan would be murderous and Saffron did his best not to feel guilty about it; he was Matt's now, after all... but he couldn't notice it seemed like the scars on his thighs burned painfully, which Landan had managed through magic before as punishment.

The bite of Saffron's nails into his skin was enough to send him over the edge, just as he'd said, and he cried out as he lost control of himself and his abilities. The power had built between them, barely noticed among the passion and need, and now it shot out away them with a strength and force he'd never imagined before. With a groan he let himself collapse beside Saffron, pulling the younger man into his arms and holding him tight. "Oh that’s gonna fucking hurt..." he muttered softly, almost sleepily as he tried not to think about what he'd just done.

Saffron moved slightly, half snuggled against Matt, but wincing at the pain Landan was causing, wondering how in the world Landan knew. He snuggled even closer to Matt, his face against his shoulder, not really replying and trying to shut out the pain a moment. Awen's yell from down stairs startled Saffron with a scare, he'd actually forgotten.

"MATTIAS!" Came Awen's voice.


Matt groaned softly. "Told you this would hurt.” he said softly. “Yeah Yeah... zombies in the yard... I know..." he called back with a heavy sigh. "She fucking hates my zombies..." he added in a soft mutter. " Bet she's freaking big time... feels like there's a shit load of them..." he added then suddenly noticed how tense Saffron felt beside him. "You okay, angel?" he asked softly.

Saffron thought it was probably better to lie, Matt was already out to kill Landan as it was and managed to nod, his jaw clenched from the pain, before he forced himself to take a breath. "You...you should go... see about the zombies..." He managed in a whisper, keeping his eyes closed. "I'll...I'll be down soon..."

"Zombies in the yard my ass! It's a fucking invasion!" Came Awen's reply.

Matt watched Saffron and frowned softly. He glanced at the edge of the loft and yelled back. "Oh suck it up, Awen… they're fucking dead! They won’t hurt you!"  He looked back to Saffron and caressed his cheek. "You're lying to me... and doing a really shitty job of it...You're in pain... I hurt you, didn’t I?" he asked softly.

Saffron couldn't answer and rolled up on his side, curling up. He could almost feel Landan's extreme anger and whimpered softly in pain, his hands going down to his thighs. He buried his head in the pillow he'd had, biting it to keep from crying, and began to hate Landan more then he had ever hated any one...with the exception of Right.

"Mattias! Have you looked out the fucking window?!" Came Awen and it sounded like she'd left the kitchen, heading for the stairs. "If you had neighbors, the cops would be arriving soon with the amount of zombies out there! What EXACTLY did you do?!"

Matt felt his eyes burn as he watched Saffron. "Oh gods... angel I'm so sorry..." he said softly, leaning down to brush a light kiss over his cheek. "I'm so sorry..." he repeated, then sat up, getting off the bed and grabbing a pair of jeans off the floor and pulling them on. Awen was part way up the stairs when he brushed past her. "I've got it... take care of Saffron, please.." he said softly.

Awen blinked, seeing an obvious change in Matt and frowned, looking up the stairs, before heading up the rest of the way. She heard a soft cry from Saffron on the bed as she reached the landing and scowled, seeing Saffron practically naked, the skirt bunched around his waist. She went to the bed quickly. "Saffron, are you okay?! What happened?! What did Matt do?!" Awen asked, sitting beside him.

Saffron shook his head furiously, despite the tears. "Not... not Matt!" Saffron gasped. "He...he didn't hurt me!"

Awen blinked and frowned, reaching out to brush the hair off Saffron's face. "Then what's wrong?" She asked.

"Landan..." Saffron gasped, curling up more.

Awen let her gaze travel over him, noticing his hands were holding his thighs. She frowned more, before closing her eyes a moment, summoning her magic. Opening her eyes again, they saw with a way to see any magic, and could see where the spell was. She moved, gently prying Saffron's hands away and sighed. "Oh lards... Did Landan do this?" She asked softly. Saffron managed to nod.

Awen let her gaze take in the scars and had a feeling she knew why Landan had done them considering they were stark and close to Saffron's groin. "When did he do this?" She asked softly as she cast a counter spell, one powerful enough it broke Landan's.

Saffron gasped, feeling the pain vanishing, but stayed the way he was. "When...when he found out...I wasn't a girl..." Saffron answered in a whisper.

 "Almost a year ago..." Awen added, knowing that was the answer. Saffron merely nodded. Awen moved suddenly, her own eyes dark with anger, and she moved Saffron with no trouble, putting him in the middle of the bed and pulling the quilt over him. "Stay here, Saffron." She said softly.

Saffron looked up at her, the fear obviously. "Matt didn't do anything! He didn't hurt me!" Saffron whispered.

"I know, hun. And I need to go make sure he knows it. He thinks he did." She said softly, covering him up, before turning and heading down stairs rather quickly, and went to find her baby brother, all the while more furious at Landan then she'd ever been.


~~


Matt didn't bother heading out to the kitchen door where he'd emerge facing the deepest part of the cemetery. Instead he just walked out the front door and  headed towards the fence where he could already see them gathering, trying to find a way through to him. For a moment he stopped and stared, amazed at just how many he'd raised, feeling so many more beyond these ones and around the other side of the church as well. With a dry snort, he closed his eyes, his anger and disgust at himself for having hurt Saffron, obviously quite badly, filling him once more.

He tried to focus, still feeling that power surge there, trying to use it to send them back to their graves... a few went but the others stayed where they were, as if sensing his conflict. His anger grew at being 'ignored', then his gaze caught on something that didn’t belong. Another of Landan's 'gifts' it seems... a few articles of Saffron’s clothing, slashed and hung from one of the trees near the church. The sight only pushed him over the edge and his eyes grew so dark they looked almost black, and the power seemed to thicken the air around him. He’d never felt this much power before.. and he'd never felt this angry. With a sharp curse he threw his power and command outward, his anger and rage strengthening it and he watched as well as felt the dead cry out as they sunk back to their graves. He didn’t know if he'd actually hurt them, or if it had just been a reaction to the power… but either way, it disturbed him. He backed a few steps towards the church, his horrified gaze on the cemetery that now stood empty again, then he turned and hurried back inside, afraid of what he'd let himself do.

He made his way into the kitchen, pulling the blinds closed so he couldn’t see out anymore, thank sank into a chair facing the patio anyhow. He wasn't sure what was worse.. the fact that he'd hurt Saffron ... or that fact that using all that power to lash out and hurt and maybe even destroy all those zombies like that had felt really good. It just reminded him of why he'd been alone to start with...

Awen found him in the kitchen and eyed him a moment from the door way before she entered. "You need to take Saffron to da's place in Ireland, as soon as possible." She said softly, taking a chair beside Matt. "His place is shielded from magic, and Landan won’t be able to torment Saffron there this way. I think he's close by...or been scrying the two of you the entire time...Da's going to be furious when he finds out about this..."

Matt just nodded slightly not really paying attention, his thoughts still elsewhere. "Yeah." he answered simply. "Forget shopping...we'll make due." he added softly.

Awen sighed, before leaning forward and catching Matt's chin, making him look at her. "You did NOT hurt him, Matt. It wasn't you." She stressed seriously. "He's terrified that you think you did. You didn't. I'm sure you... noticed the scars, on the inside of his thighs. I'm not sure if you noticed how close to his groin they were...Landan did that, when he found out Saffron wasn't a girl." Awen said softly, but seriously. "And upstairs... Landan was causing the pain, through a spell. Using the scars as a physical anchor. I countered the spell, stopping the pain, but Saffron would be safer in Ireland, where he's shielded from Landan reaching him like that."

Matt closed his eyes and nodded at that. "Okay...  thanks..." he said softly, relieved and yet still numb. "I'll go toss some things in a bag and we'll get dressed and then go..." he added, still in that same soft, rather dead tone as he stood and started for the living room.

Awen frowned, watching him go, wondering if he'd even heard her. She sighed and shook her head, taking out her cell phone and leaving a message for their father that she was taking them to Ireland.

Saffron was still laying where Awen had put him, in the middle of the bed, though he'd managed to stop crying. He knew no doubt Landan was still furious but Awen's spell was blocking him from being able to reach Saffron right now, though it still didn't ease all of Saffron's fear. He felt Matt coming up the stairs and gasped softly, scrubbing furiously at his eyes a moment, before moving to sat up, the quilt still covering him and he was still holding George in one hand.

Matt reached the top landing and turned, heading towards the bed, not looking up until he was half way there. He stopped as he saw Saffron looking lost, clutching his teddy bear and huddled into the blankets in the middle the bed. He moved a bit quicker the rest of the way and crawled over the bed to Saffron's side, pulling him into his arms. "I love you, Saff..." he whispered softly, holding him close. "Awen told me." he added simply.

Saffron burrowed himself into Matt's arms, clinging to him, though he still held the teddy bear. "You didn't hurt me, Matt! You didn't, it was him!" He whispered softly but earnestly, looking up at Matt, his eyes slightly wide, but desperate for Matt to believe him, before he pressed his face against Matt's chest with a sniffle, the tears coming again. "I'm sorry...I should have told you about the scars!" He whimpered softly. "I was... I was ashamed...So many people called me ugly...for the scars on my back...I..." He trailed off.

"Shhh... shhhh. It's alright, angel..." he whispered softly, holding him close and stroking his hair. "It's okay... Awen told me it was Landan...  I know I didn't hurt you... it's okay..." he repeated softly. "He'll pay for every hurt he's ever cause you, Saffron. I swear." he said, then tipped his chin up and kissed him. "Come on... we'll get dressed and get our things and Awen will take us through to Ireland... we can shower and  everything there...away from Landan."

"You're...not mad at me...for not telling you?" He asked softly, looking up at him, before sighing softly. He hesitated a moment, before kissing Matt back. "Matt...about... you making love to me...thank you...its never been that good..." He added even softer, blushing darkly, but having to say it.

Matt couldn’t help the soft smile at Saffron's words as he slipped from the bed and stood, pulling Saffron with him. "No, angel... I'm not mad... you weren't in any shape to tell me... and I wasn't in any shape to listen." he added simply as he lifted Saffron out of the bed and into his arms. He kissed him tenderly before setting him on his feet again. "And thank you... it's never been that good for me either... " he said simply, trying not to think about the power boost it had given him. "Come on... let's get dressed and go."


~~

Rin's house in Ireland wasn't large, but it wasn't small either, and was completely comfortable. From the moment you entered, you felt peaceful and safe. The house keeper had clean up and made sure the kitchen was stocked. It was already evening time there. Awen stoked the fire in the front room a moment. She was lingering to make sure they'd settle in okay. "I'll check in from time to time." She told Matt.

Saffron was looking out the front window at the yard. He'd realized some how that this house, wasn't far from the small town he'd been born and raised in and wasn't sure if he was surprised by this or not...though it brought back memories of the night he was kidnapped and he was trying to forget that.

"And as soon as I hear back from da, I'm sure he'll be stopping in as well." Awen added, eyeing her baby brother a moment. She started to ask him if he was okay, but restrained herself.

Matt tore his gaze away from Saffron, having been watching the younger man look around. "Yeah... thanks." he said softly. "See if you can't keep the bastard from trashing my place, alright? " he asked then caught the look on her face. He sighed and offered a weak smirk. "I'm alright... just... still dealing with what happened..." he answered simply.

Awen sighed softly eyeing Matt a moment, then nodded. "Alright. And don't worry about your place...it'll be fine." she added. "I'd best get back there." She added, before opening a rift and slipping through, leaving them alone.

Saffron didn't seem to notice her departure. He was toying with a lock of hair, twisting it around his fingers, lost in the terrible memory of that night. It'd been storming night, and he remembered waking up scared and frightened and going in search of his father, but never finding him. Instead he'd found LiVed in the living room, waiting for him and in forming him his father didn't want him any more that he'd sold him to LiVed...Saffron remembered Rin being there, because he'd carried him to Hell...

Matt walked to Saffron and slipped his arms around him, pulling him close. He didn't say anything since he wasn't sure what to say and he had his own thoughts to sort through, so instead he simply stood there and held him.

Saffron jumped at feeling Matt pulling him close, coming out of his thoughts. For a moment he was quiet as he made himself relax, before he spoke softly. "I was born not too far from here...lived not too far from here actually..." He said rather softly. "I wonder...if that’s how LiVed found me in the first place..." He turned his eyes toward the sky outside and wasn't surprised to see it cloudy.

Matt snorted softly. "Dad would never have betrayed you, Saffron. He did everything he could to help you... even abandoning his own kid just to stay close to you and do what he could for you..." he said softly.

Saffron sighed softly, before turning from the window finally, into Matt's arms, leaning against him. "I...don't think he did... but I wouldn't put it past LiVed... to have hung around here...and found out about me. I came into my abilities when I was six...extremely young for an elemental...especially a death elemental. In fact it was my sixth birthday...May twenty fourth that I came into my abilities. I was attacked by a large dog...and I reacted on instinct...my abilities draining its life...my father was very shocked..." He said softly. He thought he heard thunder and closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against Matt's chest.

Matt smirked softly. "May twenty fourth, huh? That's kinda my birthday too… well... I was born on the twenty thrid... but I died and came back on the... " he let his voice trail off as the sudden thought hit him. "How old are you, Saffron?" he asked softly, already sure he knew the answer.

Saffron opened his eyes, looking up at Matt a bit confused for a moment. "Twenty four...I escaped LiVed and the Black Court when I was nineteen...and lived with Shane and Corey until I was twenty two..." He replied softly, more sure he'd just heard thunder. "Why...how old are you?"

Matt swallowed hard. "Holy fuck.." he said softly. "Holy fuck...... no way in hell is that a coincidence..." he muttered softly as he held him, his mind connecting the events. "It's because of me you came into your powers early..." he said. "I died and came back the day you came into yours... That has to be… I mean.... We're connected. I'm your Guardian... so... no." he suddenly said with a frown, then snorted and shook his head, "Fuck, no… I got it backwards... I died and came into my abilities... because you came into yours. You needed your Guardian... so I came into my abilities..."

Saffron blinked, frowning slightly and looked up at Matt. "The same day..." He repeated softly, raising a hand to touch Matt's cheek. It made more since that Matt would have came into his abilities, because Saffron came into his. "How...old were you?" He asked softly.

Matt swallowed as he continued to let it sink in then looked up at Saffron's question. "Ten." he said simply. "The eldest magic-less kid in the family..." he added with a wry smirk. "Not that any of the family knew I came into my own... they took off and left." he said then drew a deep breath and looked at the ceiling a moment, then looked back down. "It's like that fucking Bon Jovi song..." he said with a smirk, his eyes sparkling as his mood started to lighten.

"And which song is that?" Saffron asked softly. He found himself thinking about all the things Rin had told him over the years, about his son. And about the man Saffron was meant to be with, the man Saffron truly belonged to.

Matt smiled and reached up to brush the backs of his fingers over Saffron's cheek. "Born to be my baby... the next line is .. I was made to be your man... fits us perfectly I think..." he said with a soft chuckle, then leaned down to kiss him. "Should get settled in... see about making something to eat... You hungry?"

Saffron blushed, but found himself kissing Matt back and some how had to agree that the song fit them perfectly. "Would you be mad, if I said no?" He asked softly, with a sigh, leaning against him a moment, before shaking his head. "I know...I should eat something... and I'll really try. Awen said the kitchen was fully stocked...I can...cook something if you like..." He said softly, before smirking a bit. "I'm actually rather talented at cooking..."

Matt was going to tell him that he'd handle it, but noticed the look on his face... and decided it would help take his mind of his fears. "Sounds good. Let's go take our things up to our room and then we'll see what's in the kitchen." he said then paused. "I mean... unless you'd rather have a room to yourself... ?" he asked. "Personally... I want you right there beside me, but... I'll survive if you want some space..."

Saffron started to answer when a crash of thunder sounded outside and he startled fearfully, looking toward the window a moment wide eyed, before suddenly burrowing himself into Matt's arms. He knew it was probably silly of him to be reacting this way. But he shook his head in reply to Matt. "Let me stay with you, please..." He whispered, cringing at another crack of thunder. "Don't leave me..."

Matt smiled softly and held him close, leaning down to brush his lips over the top of Saffron's hair. "Told you... I want you right beside me. I won't leave you, angel." he said softly. "Come on... maybe we'd better go see about something to eat first incase the power goes out. I can find candles and shit in the dark, but we can't cook."

Saffron blushed at being so afraid of the storm. "I think that's probably a good idea...I mean getting something to eat first... I'm sorry...I'm afraid of storms..." He said softly, risking a glance up at Matt. "It.. .it was storming...the night LiVed...took me. I woke up while it was storming, but couldn't find my father...only LiVed. Then...then Rin took me to hell...I was eight..."

Matt lifted Saffron into his arms and headed for where he thought he remembered the kitchen being. He'd really only been there once and only very briefly.. like he'd told Saffron early, he'd just been passing through. "Are you going to be okay if he comes here, Saffron?' he asked softly as turned the light on in the kitchen, content to carry Saffron in his arms as long as he could.

Saffron looked up sharply, wide eyed, before he realized Matt meant Rin and he sighed, blushing deeply. A heavy rain was falling outside, but it was typical weather for Ireland this time of year. "I should...apologize to Rin... for the way I reacted the other night, seeing him. I know...LiVed lied to me...about saying Rin was only using me and intended to kill me. He never liked how close I got to Rin..." Saffron said softly, glancing around the comfortable sized kitchen.

Matt headed for the pantry. "Grab the doors, angel and lets see what we have." he said lightly. "He loves you, you know." he added softly. "Not... not like that, but... he loves you. When he first told me why he couldn't have been with me when I was a kid, he just said there's was another child who needed him a lot more then I did. He never told me a name or anything and he never really talked anymore about it. But I remember a part of me was jealous as hell that he loved someone else’s kid more then his own. I know now... that he was right... you did need him a hell of a lot more then I did."

Saffron was quiet for a long moment before sighing, though he'd grabbed the pantry doors. "He was the closest thing I had to a father...when I thought my own didn't want me. I honestly don't think my real father did or does want me, he never looked for me..." He shook his head at that. "But then when I was a teen...I was so sure I was in love with Rin..." He paused a moment as he looked over the contents of the pantry that was very well stocked. "I asked him once...if he had a family of his own..." Saffron said softly. "He didn't... tell me about Awen... but he told me he had a son he loved very much and was... proud of, but wished things were easier for. He said the reason he stayed in the Black Court tutoring me was because he was doing his best to protect his son. I suppose I should have listened to him more. The night I...sort a threw myself at him...and he turned me down...he told me I was meant for his son..."

"Yup... you were. And here you are." he said lightly, stealing a kiss. "I'm glad my father was there to look after you… but I'm even happier that it's my turn now."

Saffron blushed slightly, before poking him. "You're going to have to put me down, if you want me to cook something." He said softly with a slight smirk. It was still a lot for him to get used to...the idea that he was Matt's... girlfriend, but a larger part of him liked the way he felt in being so.

"Hmm... only when I absolutely have to...." Mat said softly. "Decide what you want to cook.. then I'll put you down..." he said, stealing another kiss.

Saffron snorted softly, but the slight smirk was still on his face. "Then mind carrying me over to the fridge a moment?" He asked softly, while he considered what to make for dinner.

Matt smiled softly. "Nope. Not at all." he said as he crossed to where the fridge stood and let him pull the door open. "Any recipes being inspired here?" he asked teasingly.




The power had held out so far, but the storm ragged a bit heavier as the night grew on. Matt had taken their bags up to one of the bigger bedrooms that was certainly very comfortable look, with its own large bathroom off of it, and Saffron had decided to give in to the idea of a bath. He had the water filling the tub, giving into some of the bubble bath that had been there, at the moment just in the boylegs he'd changed into earlier. Matt was in the bedroom on the phone with Awen who was giving him an update on the new...'gifts' she found, but so far Landan hadn't figured out they'd left the states.

Matt kept his gaze on the bathroom door which stood partially open. His heart leapt every time Saffron slipped into view, even partially, and the longer he watched the harder it was to keep focused on the conversation with Awen. "Any word from dad yet?" he asked then bit his lips as a flash of smooth pale skin and black lace appeared in his line of sight. It looked like Saffron was leaning down to check the water or maybe add something to the tub...

"A quick word earlier." Awen answered, more then aware Matt was distracted by his tone. "Things are still going smoothly for him." She added. "I need to run," She added. "I have to call Vivi; she's still trying to get a hold of Saffron's old friends for me..." She added, not actually having to go, but knowing she shouldn't keep him.

Saffron shut the water off in the tub after adding a little bit of bath oils. It was a rather large tub and the water was very warm. Not scolding hot, but hot. He turned back to the counter a moment, picking up his brush and running it through his hair a moment, before twisting his hair up and pinning it, before starting to slip out of the lace boylegs.

"Yeah.. okay. Give me a shout tomorrow and let me know if anything comes up...." he said simply, waiting for that flash of pale skin to cross the doorway again. "Thanks.." he added then hung up. He stayed where he was though, suddenly not so sure of things. He realized that he'd managed to push it aside for a time, but now that he was getting turned on and they'd be sharing the same bed... he was almost scared of what might happen. Taking a deep breath and rubbing his palms over his legs, he made himself head to the bathroom door and look in, watching Saffron pin up his hair. “Damn you’re beautiful…”

Saffron glanced up at Matt, hearing him, then blushed deeply, looking away a moment. He turned his back to Matt, the scars on his thighs couldn't be seen that way. "I don't think I've ever heard it when its been meant, before..." He said softly, still blushing but glanced over his shoulder at Matt. He hesitated a moment, but with his back to Matt, he went ahead and finished slipping out of the boylegs, bending over enough to slide them down, before letting them drop the rest of the way before standing straight again. He felt nervous, but at the same time, didn't want Matt to leave him alone...

"It's true. " Matt said softly, unable to look away from him. "I've never seen anyone as beautiful as you, Saffron." he quietly took the last couple steps between them and let his fingers brush over the wings tattoos over Saffron's back, feeling the scars hidden beneath. He smiled slightly and bent to kiss the tip of one wing. "You'd better get in that tub." he said softly.

Saffron's eyes closed at the feel of his lips on his shoulder, a faint whimper escaping him. But he didn't move to get in the tub just yet. "I...I don't want you to leave..." He answered in a whisper. "Would... would you join me, Matt?" He asked even softer, knowing he was blushing.

"I'll stay." he said softly. "You'd have a hard time getting me to leave.." he added with a soft smile, then turned to look for a stool to sit on. "Go on and get in before you get cold." he said simply.

Saffron couldn't help but feel just a bit disappointed, but at least he was staying. He slipped into the tub with out a reply, a soft sigh escaping him at the water feeling so very good. He leaned back, though the bubbles did cover most of him. "You... really could have you know..." He said softly, looking up at Matt, though he was blushing faintly.

Matt looked up as he set the stool down beside the tub and blushed. "I know. I want to, I just... " he sat down and let his hand dip into the water, then dribbled the water back in over top of Saffron’s chest.  He shook his head slightly, not sure how to tell him he both wanted to be with him and was afraid of it at the same time.

Saffron watched him for a moment, trying to gauge things, before closing his eyes, leaning his head back against the wall. He tried to tell himself nothing had changed between them and Matt still wanted him, but he couldn't help but feel that he'd done something wrong and that really was the case. And he'd closed his eyes against the sudden rush of tears. "If I did something wrong...I'm sorry..." He muttered softly.

Matt smiled softly, playing with another handful of water. "No angel... you didn’t do anything wrong. " he said. "I did. I'm just... trying to get a handle on it, that’s all."

Saffron opened his eyes, looking at Matt a bit surprised, though his eyes still had the tears. He frowned, a bit confused before moving a bit in the bath, leaning on his arms on the side of the tub, putting him a bit closer to Matt. "But you didn't do anything wrong..." He said softly.

Matt let the water spill from his hand again as met Saffron’s gaze. "Yeah I did. But it wasn't doing it that bothers me... it was enjoying doing it..." he said then sighed and decide to just say it. "When we made love, Saff....I got this huge power boost.. my abilities went wild and did their thing without me... woke up the entire cemetery... That’s why Awen was freaking out. It felt amazing." he said with a soft smile. "But... when I thought I'd hurt you... I was so... angry at myself. Then I was angry at Landan for all his shit... and when I tried to put some of the zombies down, it was like they resisted... and I got angry at them... So.. I took all the power and that anger and I hit them with it. It felt so good to just.. lash out like that. And with so much power..." he added. "Thing is... I think it hurt them..."

Saffron watched him as he leaned there against the side. He bit his lip a bit hard. "But you don't usually do that..." He asked softly. "You...you could control the power boost...couldn't you? Maybe...maybe channel it a different way..." He suggested softly, before blushing. "It’s just... the power boost will probably always happen...when we... make love..." He trailed off, deciding it was probably better for him to stay quiet. Though, he'd felt his own power boost at the time, his own abilities reacting like it never had before, yet he doubted it was nothing like what Matt when through.

Matt smiled at that and leaned in to kiss Saffron lightly, the ends of his hair trailing into the water and bubbles. "It's not the boost that bothers me. Yeah, I can control that... just need a bit of focus and I'll be fine..." he said, kneeling on the floor beside the tub and leaning on the edge, his fingers stroking over Saffron’s legs despite the water. "It's... I want it. I want that power... and... I want to use it." he said softly, frowning as he said it. "It felt too good..."

"Is that always such a bad case, Matt?" Saffron asked softly, looking at him innocently. He sighed softly. "All the men who've used me, claimed I gave them some kind of power rush when they had sex with me...it was part of the reason Landan kept me and probably refuses to give me up...He did bad things with his power boosts..." Saffron said softly, a miserable tone to his words, as if all the bad things Landan did, where his own fault. "But you're not like them..." He added, looking up at Matt again, the same innocent expression. He raised a wet hand, touching his cheek. "You don't have to use the boost that way again...you...you shouldn't be afraid of it..."

Matt shook his head, his eyes shut as he leaned back. "That's just it… and fuck... that just makes it even worse. That means.. I'm more like him than I ever want to be..." he said softly. "I did use the boost for 'bad things'… and it felt good." he said, then groaned softly, rubbing his hands over his face. "I'm just... I'm afraid of being like him..." he added softly.

Saffron frowned, confused before moving enough to lean forward enough and kissed Matt softly. "You're nothing like him..." He said softly, but seriously. "You're not Matt. You didn't hurt me when you found out I was a boy. You know that being tied up terrifies me, but you haven't taken pleasure in using that against me. You haven't told me what I can or can't do. Just because you had...one moment of... weakness...enjoying the power boost... doesn't make you anything like him..." He said softly, trying to convince him. "And... you love me...really love me...you're not just telling me that...to control me. Don't you...really love me I mean...?"

"Yeah I really love you, Saffron..." he said softly, the sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry... I.. I just can't explain it... the way it felt when I used it... and when I saw it hurt them... It felt good to hurt them, Saffron... " he said softly. "I fucking hate myself for enjoying it... not the power, not for using it or wanting it... but for enjoying using it to hurt something.... It was petty and vindictive and stupid… and it was something Landan would've done." he said softly.

Saffron sighed softly, not really sure what to say to him. Part of him did understand, perhaps a little better then he should be able to. He let his hand caress Matt's cheek a moment. "Matt... would you please join me in the bath..." He asked softly, hoping maybe he could distract him. A sudden loud crack of thunder sounded and the lights flicked, dimming. "Please..." Saffron asked, his voice taking on a desperate tone of needing to be distracted himself, his fear of the storm showing in his eyes.

Matt smirked softly and leaned down to kiss him tenderly. "Yeah... I'll join you. Just a second." he said then stood. "I'll be right back, alright? I'm just in the bedroom..." he said then slipped out to grab a couple of the candles that stood at the ready on the dresser. He returned to find Saffron ducked so low in the tub he was almost hidden by the reflection of the light  an oily sheen on the water, and smiled softly as he lit the candles. Pushing aside his fears, he quickly undressed, determined to only think of Saffron right then. "Alright... scoot forward and let me in behind you...”

Saffron had moved enough to drain some of the water, before slipping low into the water, so when Matt came back he moved forward enough to slip in behind him in the hot water. Saffron was thankful he'd brought the candles, considering it was about then the power failed. He eyed the window that was in the bathroom, as it brightened with every flash of lightening. He knew it was silly, that there was no chance of LiVed finding him here, but the storms still scared him, always making him feel like some one was waiting in the darkness for him.

Matt slipped into the hot water, settling in behind Saffron carefully so he didn't slosh too much water out onto the floor. He smirked slightly as he realized Saffron like the water extra hot, same as he did. He leaned back, his arms slipping around Saffron. "If you're getting squeezed too much sitting like that... you can lay on top of me... you'll get poked either way..." he said softly.

Saffron blushed slightly, but the tub was rather large anyway, he didn't think any of that would be a problem. He did his best to turn his attention off the storm and leaned back against Matt, cuddling back against him. "You know... I don't...think I've ever...shared a bath with any one..." He said softly. He winced slightly at the loud thunder, but kept himself from looking toward the window.

Matt rested one arm around Saffron’s stomach holding his close, and reached up to stroke his cheek and throat lightly. "Me neither... shared a shower a few times... but never a bath. My tubs big enough… just.. never invited any one over let alone any one I'd ever consider sharing a bath with..." he said with a soft chuckle. "Then again... who better to share firsts like this with then my first real girlfriend?

Saffron blinked, turning slightly enough in the bath to look back up at Matt a bit surprised. "The way you say that... surely you've had other...girlfriends...?" He replied softly. He turned a bit on his side, laying back against Matt, his head on Matt's shoulder. "I'd think you would have plenty of girlfriends. I know too many girls who would be...very attracted to you..."

Matt smirked softly. "I've never really dated anyone. Sure there were girls. And yeah, sure they were attracted to me... but... it was just sex. A couple were sort of friends to some extant for a while, but... I still wouldn't call them 'girlfriends' really... " he said then leaned forward to kiss Saffron's neck softly.  Another boom of thunder and flash of lightening had Saffron jerking against him in fright and Matt squeezed him a bit tighter with his one arm. With the other he plucked a wash cloth from the edge of the tub and dipped it in the hot water, wringing it out and laying it over Saffron’s eyes, blocking out the light. "Relax, angel... I've got you."

Saffron couldn't help the slight trembling, and he left the cloth were it was for a moment, listening to the heavy rain outside, but it didn't help very much either. He took a breath, before moving, turning around completely, straddling Matt's legs, so he couldn't look toward the window and moved the cloth. He kept the subject away from the storm. "Didn't you care about any of them? The other girls I mean..." He asked softly, looking up at Matt. "Though I can certainly understand their attraction to you..." He added with a blush.

Matt let his hands drop to Saffron's hips, stroking his hands up over his waist until they emerged from the water. With a soft sigh he pulled him down so he was laying on top of him, his head on his chest just out of the water. "Guess there were a couple I cared a bit about.. but... nothing like this." he said softly. "Not enough to want to think of them as 'girlfriends'. At least, not now that I have you and know what it should feel like..."

Saffron sighed softly, "Must have been awfully lonely..." He said softly, finding himself relax as he lay there against Matt. "From my point of view... if they didn't fall for you, they were stupid girls..." He blushed slightly, but couldn't help but smirk. "You're...everything I ever...dreamed about in a man..." He admitted in a whisper, knowing he was blushing. He moved slightly, squirming a bit, but moving closer, a soft whimper escaping him as he rubbed against Matt's erection. "I just...never thought I'd meet a man like you...rather thought all those...qualities would stay in my fantasies..."

Matt's eyes closed as he bit back the moan that wanted to escape. The feel of Saffron laying against him had been wonderful enough, but him moving... "Baby... stop wiggling..." he said softly, opening his eyes a bit as he stroked Saffron's face. "As for the girls... they weren't stupid. Well okay, a couple of them were but I didn't care about their brains..." he admitted with a wicked smirk. "But like I was saying... they weren't stupid... they just weren't you. I wasn't what they wanted... aside from sex... and that only lasts so long."

Saffron snorted softly, but didn't stop wiggling all together, moving just a bit more, to get more comfortable, and because he liked the feel of rubbing up against Matt. "I rather think it's stupid of them...just...to use you for sex..." He said softly. "But then I certainly know what it's like to be used for sex..." He sighed softly, before looking up at Matt. "You're my first you know. First...real lover...Shane and Corey thought about hooking me up with a friend of theirs once...until they found out he was a former client of mine..." He trailed off, before he suddenly started to move, to get off Matt. "I'm sorry, Matt... I just...how can...how can you want to be with me... knowing...what I am..." He said in a confused whisper, his eyes sparkling with tears.

Matt caught hold of him and pulled him back down, the water splashing over the edge onto the floor. He cradled him against his chest and wrapped his arms around him tightly. "I love you." he said softly. "How can you want to be with me knowing what I am?" he asked in reply.

Saffron looked up at him, a few tears slipping down his cheeks and shook his head, confused. "What do you mean, what you are? You're my guardian..." He replied in a whisper, taking a deep breath trying to hold back his tears. "I'm a... slave...and... a prostitute... not to mention a whore..." He replied in a whisper. "I can kill some one, just by touching them... if I wanted, but I never fought back... never. I'm a terrible death elemental..." He choked on his own words and suddenly clung to Matt, ignoring the raging storm for a moment. "Did you know Landan's girlfriend knew he was keeping me...she'd be in the apartment, when he'd summon me...she even watched once or twice, when he'd tie me up...in their own bed...and I never fought back. He wouldn't tell LiVed where I was...as long as I let him do what he wanted..."

Matt tried not to let his fury at Landan's treatment of him show, and instead soothed Saffron as well as he could, cradling him in his arms in the hot water, stroking his face. "Shh... it's alright baby... none of that matters anymore... You’re with me now. You're mine now.." he said softly.

"I just...don't understand..." Saffron whispered, a bit confused and anguished. "How you can want me...knowing I was...Landan's whore..?" He sniffled and buried his face against Matt's neck a moment, struggling to hold back the tears. A soft whimper left him as he found himself kissing and nuzzling Matt's neck. He moved, rubbing his body against Matt's as he continued to kiss his neck, jumping slightly at the crack of thunder, but didn't pull away.

Matt moaned softly as he loosened his hold on Saffron enough to let him move, but not leave. "You're not the only one who had to do bad shit to survive, baby... " He let the fingers of one hand slide back and forth over Saffron’s hip and backside. "I grew up on the streets... I did my share of whoring..." he added softly.

Saffron sighed, for a moment, just laying his head against Matt's shoulder, his face turned in toward his neck. "Then we have a lot in common, Matt..." He replied in a whisper, before moving again, pulling back enough to look up at him. He raised a hand, brushing his fingers tenderly over Matt's cheek. "No wonder we were meant for each other..." He added softly, leaning in and kissing his lips in a tender and heart felt kiss. His other hand caressed down Matt's chest, into the water, fluttering lower, his finger tips brushing lightly over the length of him. "I thought once before, I knew what love felt like...but I was wrong...you're the only one who's ever made me feel this way, Matt...You could tie me up, and I'd still love you..."

Matt blushed furiously at that as he smirked. "Hey... when done right... a little bondage can be damned fun..." he admitted it, squirming slightly beneath Saffron’s touch. "But I won’t ask that of you, angel. I don’t ever want to remind you of that..."

He continued to let his fingers brush lightly, even teasingly over Matt's erection for a moment, and looked up at him, his eyes a bit lighter in the candle light, hazy. "I would let you...if you wanted to... tie me up I mean..." The death elemental in Saffron suddenly wanted to do just that, just to see if it could be better with Matt the rest.

Matt just shook his head softly then leaned into to kiss him, his hands slipping over Saffron’s backside completely with a squeeze. "Gods baby..." he growled softly through the kiss. "We should get out of this tub or we're going to make one big fucking mess....."

Saffron didn't want move just yet, and let his fingers brush a bit more, not so lightly, before wrapping his fingers around the hard length of Matt, letting his hand stroke for a moment as he kissed Matt back. He closed his eyes for a moment, noticing the intensity of the storm, the heavy rain, and howling wind. "Its wicked of me...I know...and yet...tonight...I... I want to...to ask you...to...tie... me up..." He whispered, blushing darkly, and surprised at himself for saying it out loud.

Matt's hands squeezed tighter in response to Saffron’s hold on him, but he met his gaze. The last thing he wanted to do was remind Saffron of the pain he'd been through... but maybe he could avoid that and help distract him from the storm at the same time. "Out of the tub and get dried off, angel." he said softly, his voice husky with desire as he reluctantly let go of him.

Saffron didn't move for a moment, just running his hand up and down in slow long strokes, before he kissed Matt deeply a moment, then slipped from him and the tub, grabbing a large towel off the counter, unfolding it and wrapping it about himself. In the towel, any one else would have thought he was a girl and he blushed slightly, but tucked the end, before taking the pins out of his hair, letting it fall down around his shoulders and back, before picking up the brush to brush it out a moment, waiting for Matt.

Sitting the brush aside, hearing Matt getting out of the bath, he picked up one of the candles and carefully made his way back into the bed room. He looked at the fire place, which was ready to be lit and made his way over to it. Sitting the candle on the mantel a moment, he knelt in the towel, lighting the fire. A warm glow, along with the heat began filling the bedroom and he glanced around and noticed the soft corded tie around the curtains. As he closed those, he snatched up the cord, before heading toward the bed and pulled the blankets back.

Matt dried off a bit before wrapping the towel around his waist. He pulled the drain on the tub and tossed another towel down to absorb the water that had sloshed over the edge of the tub and onto the floor. Plucking up the other candle he followed Saffron, setting his candle beside the other. He smiled softly at the fire blazing away cheerfully and looked over at Saffron.

Saffron had pulled back the blankets, and the soft cord was laying on one of the pillows. Saffron was sitting on the edge of the bed, still in the towel, his hair hiding his face. He felt Matt's eyes on him and raised his head a bit, looking through the locks of his hair, the blush covering his body. "I don't know how long... the power will be out. I thought the fire would be nice...and good for the warmth..." Saffron whispered softly, cringing at a rather loud and close crash of thunder, the lightening briefly illuminating the room. Saffron took a deep breath then undid the towel, letting it fall open.

Matt watched him a moment longer then let his own towel drop to the floor. "It's perfect angel." he said softly as he headed towards the bed. His gaze slipped over the bed and the cords and he looked back to Saffron. "We don’t have to do this, angel... it's not something I need. Besides... I love it when you scratch me... can't do that it you're tied up..."

Saffron was still blushing still, but he looked up at Matt, biting his lip for a moment. "I...I want... you too..." He whispered, looking down again, before he moved, standing up before him. He laid a hand on Matt's chest, leaning up and kissing him softly. "I want to try..." He whispered. "Please..." His hand caressed down Matt's chest, his fingers brushing over him.

Matt slipped his hands over Saffron’s waist holding him a moment as he kissed him. "Okay... if it's what you want... but if you can't take it you tell me, alright?" he said softly. "I'll untie you and just fuck your brains out the good old fashioned way.." he added with a wicked smirk as he kissed Saffron’s neck. "Deal?"

A faint smile came to Saffron at his words, but he nodded. "Okay..." He replied softly, his fingers still brushing over Matt. He let his fingers wrap around him for a moment, stroking in long slow strokes again. "Thank you..." He whispered, pulling back enough to look up at him seriously. He wasn't sure he could explain to Matt how much this meant to him, that Matt was willing to try. He leaned up again, and kissed Matt, deep and passionate a moment before he slipped away from him, turning and leaning over to grab the cord. Landan had always put Saffron on his knees, before tying his wrists, doing anything from fucking him in that position to making Saffron go down on him. Saffron bit his lip, before turning and taking one of Matt's hands, laying the cord in his hand.

Matt looked at the cord a moment before closing his hand around it. "Hmm.. decisions, decisions..." he said softly, his eyes starting to sparkle. He glanced over at the head board then smiled a bit more. "Go lay down in the middle of the bed on your stomach." he said softly. "Make sure you crawl nice and slow when you do... You look sexy as hell by firelight..."

Saffron blinked a moment, eyeing him, before turning and crawling on to the bed, making his way to the middle of the bed, the fire light glistening off the wings on his back, the feathers in he wings seeming to shimmer. He decided to put all his trust in Matt, he knew it was the only way he'd get over his fear, though he had a feeling he might never get over his fear of leather belts. And quite possibly never really get over his fear period, at least where everyone else was concerned, but Matt was his guardian, and Saffron wanted to try, at least just with Matt.

Matt waited until Saffron was lying still, his face turned towards him, then started towards the bed. He crawled onto the mattress, staying on his knees as he grabbed Saffron’s legs and pulled him a bit farther down, then knelt beside him and stroked his hair a moment. "Still sure about this?" he asked softly as he took hold of one wrist and rubbed the cord over it lightly.

Saffron trembled, his eyes going from Matt's face to the cord as it rubbed over his wrist. He closed his eyes a moment, and took a breath. A small part of him screamed he wasn't, but the rest of him, including the death elemental refused to back down. The submissive in him surprised him by making him open his eyes, to look up at Matt. "Yus..." He whispered almost unheard. "Please Matt..."

Matt bent down and kissed him softly then pulled Saffron's wrists together over his head and quickly wrapped them together, before tying the other end of the rope to the head board. There was enough slack for Saffron to move his arms a bit, but his hands were secure. As soon as he was finished, Matt let his hands run down along Saffron's arms and then his ribs, bending to kiss his neck. "I love you, angel." he said softly with another kiss, his hands stroking over Saffron’s ribs and lower back. "You're safe with me... I'll never hurt you..." he said, his mouth moving down to where the tattoo started on Saffron’s shoulder. "I'll never use you." he whispered with another kiss. "You're mine now..."

Saffron whimpered softly and squirmed slightly. He raised his head enough to look up at his wrists tied, his heart pounding wildly. He was confused by the fact that while he felt the terror of having his wrists tied, at the same time with Matt kissing his shoulders, and whispering to him, he wasn't tugging to get free yet. A small part of him was even starting to get turned on. He moved slightly, his legs spreading a bit.

Matt smiled softly as he stroked his fingers lightly over Saffron's shoulder blades, feeling the slight twinges along his muscles. He moved over and knelt above him, straddling his upper legs so when he leaned forward his erection rubbed against Saffron’s backside. He stayed pressed against him for a moment as he kissed the base of Saffron’s neck, teasingly, then sat up straight and rubbed his hands together briskly to warm them before starting to massage Saffron's shoulders and back.

Saffron gasped softly in surprise. He managed to turn his head enough to look back at Matt, the surprise clear in his eyes. "You... you don't have to be doing that..." He whispered. He couldn't remember a single time he'd ever been given a massage. "I... I mean...the massage..." He added with a blush.

Matt smirked softly. "What are you going to do? Stop me? You wanted to be tied up... so now I get to do what ever I want..." he said softly before leaning down, rubbing himself against him as he kissed the back of his neck again before sitting back up and resuming the massage. "...and I want to do this. Don't worry... I want to do a hell of a lot more then JUST the massage..."

A soft nervous giggle escaped Saffron as he buried his face in the pillow under his head for a moment, blushing darkly enough that it spread over his body. "I've... never...had a massage..." He admitted in a whisper, a soft moan escaping him as he felt Matt rubbing against him a moment. He took a soft deep breath, shoving everything else out of his mind, and found he'd stopped trembling. So instead of protesting Matt's massage, he submitted, letting him do what he wanted and turned his head to the side, just laying there, his body relaxing, no longer tense.

Matt smiled to himself as he felt Saffron slowly relax beneath him, then leaned down and licked the entire length of one scar that he could just make out beneath the tattoo, his eyes sparkling brightly as he did.

A pleasurable shiver passed through Saffron as he gasped softly. No one had ever paid Saffron's scars any attention, and he whimpered softly. "Matt..." His body arched slightly up against Matt's mouth, his eyes closed. He found himself more aroused then scared.

"Shhh" Matt said softly as he brushed his lips over Saffron’s back seeking the next scar, then gave it similar treatment, feeling Saffron buck and squirm beneath him each time. "Every time they tied you up they made you afraid and tense... they've hurt you... marked you...." he said quietly as he kissed and licked his way over the wings tattooed on the pale skin. "I'm trying to undo all of that in a way.. well... Except the 'marking you' part... I might have to give you a mark of my own to carry..." he added with a soft growl and nipped playfully at one cheek.

Saffron moaned softly, his eyes still closed. "If... if you wanted to...mark me...you can..." He whispered in reply. He some how knew he'd never truly get over his fear of being tied up, and while he felt Matt could have kept his belts, he knew he'd never be able to touch one with out remembering, but this...wasn't so bad and he knew it was because of Matt. He drew in a sharp breath at feeling Matt nip at his cheek and suddenly closed his legs again, worried about how close he was to the scars there. "How... how can you touch my scars...with out revulsion...?" He whispered. "Everyone else...said...they made me ugly..."

"There's nothing about you that's ugly, Saffron..." Matt said softly as he slid  his body backwards down Saffron's legs, kissing and licking his way lower down his back and along the wings where they topped Saffron’s back side. "You're beautiful, Saffron... and they're a part of you... so they're beautiful too..." he added. "Spread your legs, angel.."

Saffron whimpered, now suddenly afraid and he hesitated. "But... but I got those scars...for being...deceitful...and the ones on my back...as...punishment..." He whispered, his own words seeming wrong to him. But Matt had told him to and after a moment longer of hesitating, opened his legs, despite the scars.

Matt let his hands slip between Saffron's legs and caressed his thighs a moment. "You got these scars because you're beautiful and they couldn't stand to know that you would never really be theirs..." he said softly, moving back a bit more. "They figured if they left their mark upon you that I wouldn't find you beautiful when you came to me and wouldn’t want you.... But I do find you beautiful, Saffron... and I do want you..." he added, bending to kiss the newly revealed scars.

A shiver passed through Saffron, and he whimpered softly, turning his head, able to look back at Matt slightly. "You're the only one who's found me beautiful... truly found me beautiful...even if I do pass far easier as a girl..." He sighed softly, letting his legs move a little more, making himself a bit more comfortable, and forced himself to relax more, but sighed. "I'm sorry...that I prefer posing as a girl...its just...after all these years of being forced to live as one...that’s how I'm most comfortable..."

"Shhh..." Matt said, looking over Saffron's back as he paused in his exploration. "I haven't complained, have I? I think you should be how ever you feel comfortable being... and you do make a gorgeous girl..." he added before bending to lick along one of the longer scars, his check brushing against more sensitive parts as he did.

Saffron gasped, squirming slightly, but let his eyes close. A soft smile came to him at Matt's words and decided if Matt really felt that way, then Saffron would, he'd be the way that made him most comfortable. "Thank you, Matt..." Saffron whispered, laying his head on the pillow, the soft smile still on his lips. "You can do as you wish with me..." He added softly a coy and playful edge to his words.

Matt laughed softly at that. "I though I already was..." he said lightly then slipped a hand beneath Saffron, letting Saffron's erection pressed into the palm of his hand rather then the bed as he continued to kiss and lick the scars he could reach.

Saffron moaned softly, "I...suppose you were...but..." He trailed off, swallowing hard as another pleasurable shiver passed through him. He couldn't ask him not to tease, after all, Saffron was the one who'd wanted to be tied up. He squirmed slightly against his touch, his arms pulling at the cord slightly. "Matt...I...want you..." Saffron whimpered softly.

Matt gave a final kiss, leaving his hand where it was. "I know." he said softly, his eyes still sparkling. "I'm not finished with you yet, don’t worry..." he added then moved to Saffron side. "Roll over, angel..." he said, even as he all but picked him up and turned him over himself, the cord having enough slack not to pinch Saffron's wrists at the move. He helped Saffron settle more comfortably, then leaned over to catch his mouth in a hungry kiss.

Saffron leaned up enough to kiss Matt hungry and deep in reply, as he found himself laying on his back against the pillows. His eyes closed, a soft moan escaping him. He left his legs spread, one knee bent. No one had ever taken their time with him when he was tied up, and he really couldn't think of a time when he was on his back. So far, it didn't hurt.

Matt let his hands stroke over Saffron's chest as he kissed him, his fingers coming to rest on one bud of a nipple that they pinched playfully. "The few others times someone was brave enough to let me tie them up... it wasn't like this. It was fun and all... but I was... crueler, I guess. Not that they ever complained... well.. much anyhow..." he added with a soft chuckle, his mouth moving down to replace his fingers, nipping and licking lightly. His fingers slipped around Saffron’s chest to the other nipple to resume their own torment. "I like it this way better...."

Saffron inhaled sharply, his body arching a bit off the bed. He pulled slightly at the cord, it was different, not being able to touch Matt, but at the same time, it was a sweet kind of torture. "You...you could be crueler... if you wanted..." Saffron whispered a bit breathlessly, managing to open his eyes to look downward at Matt.

Matt looked up at him and let the next playful nip be a bit harder before kissing the abused bit of flesh. "Maybe some other time." he said simply. "But I really don’t know if I'll ever want to be that way with you, Saffron..." he added, his hands caressing over Saffron’s ribs as he bent to kiss his way down the center of his chest. " I gotta be able to enjoy even the bits of pain I cause... and, baby... I don’t want to. Not with you."

Saffron found himself struggling to catch his breath a moment and looked down at Matt, his dark green eyes already a bit lighter with a hazy desire. "Some how...Matt...I don't think...you'll ever be... as cruel as they were..." He managed to whisper, but his tone was serious. He moaned softly, arching a bit more off the bed against him.

"I didn't mean cruel like that... I've never hurt a woman more then she wanted, and only during sex... and it was always reciprocated..." he added softly as his hands slipped over Saffron’s hips and he let his lips brush against the heat of Saffron’s erection.

Saffron gasped, his hips coming off the bed, and he found himself tugging at the cord a moment as he moaned. "Oh...oh Matt...you... you don't have to...to.. touch...me there..." Saffron whimpered softly, the blush covering his whole body, he just couldn't think of a single time in bed that any one had ever touched him there, other then...out of spite or an accidental brush.

Matt looked up at him at that. "Angel... I try never do anything I don’t want to do... so if I'm doing something.. its because I want to." he said simply. The only time he'd ever been with another guy, aside from Saffron, had been when he was hardly more then a kid on the streets. A friend had told him it was an easy way to make some cash so he'd gone along with him and a couple of guys. When the one had made him give him a blow job, he'd hated it and ended up biting him... for which the two of them had beat the shit out of him and his buddy had raped him. He'd tracked them down later on and made them pay for it and it had been a few years before he'd ever turned another trick and then only with women. The fact that he was doing this with Saffron now and enjoying it should have been surprising to him, and yet it was just one more thing that felt right.

Saffron gasped, with a whimpered moan, squirming a bit. His hips came off the bed with every brush of Matt's lips, he'd never felt these kinds of sensations, loving the way it felt. "Matt..." He moaned softly, wantonly, twisting a bit more. A small part of him wanted to beg Matt to untie him, but only because he wanted to be able to touch Matt. There was no pain, and he wasn't feeling any terror yet. Just a rather twisted blissful torture, the fantastic way Matt was making him feel, mixed with the fact that Saffron couldn't touch him yet.

Matt pushed himself a bit more, testing his own comfort level and let his tongue slip around the tip of him, tasting the pre cum that had gathered. He gave a low moan, letting go of a bit of his reserve and moving to straddle Saffron's chest. "You're turn, angel." he said softly, one hand slipping down to lift and cradle Saffron’s head as he let the tip of his own erection brush over Saffron’s lips. "Just a taste though..." he added, his eyes sparkling.

Saffron moaned softly, squirming slightly but raised his head enough to let his lips brush over Matt's erection, a slightly wicked smirk coming to him, before he let his tongue run along the length of him, down one side and then circled around his tip, licking teasingly, tasting the pre cum, before running his tongue along the other side.

Matt let his eyes close a moment, just enjoying it. Part of him was suddenly tempted to take Saffron up on his offer to be a bit rougher... but as he looked down at those gorgeous eyes watching him, he just couldn’t do it. "Give him a good bye kiss, angel... he's got somewhere to go.." he said lightly.

A soft giggle escaped Saffron, despite the blush and he let his tongue run over the length of him another moment, before kissing the tip. He was surprised at himself, for being so relaxed, some small part of him feeling like this all had to be a dream, it to was too wonderful to be true.

Matt smirked softly, his eyes closing at the soft press of Saffron’s lips against him, then made himself move away. He let his fingers of one hand trail down over Saffron’s chest, the other hand stroking himself lightly as he watched Saffron squirm beneath his touch. "Bend your knees, angel.." he said softly as he moved to kneel between Saffron's legs.

Saffron took the moment to catch his breath, closing his eyes for a moment as he took a soft deep breath, before moving enough to bend his legs, his feet resting on the bed, his legs spread open enough for Matt to kneel between them. He opened his eyes again, looking up at Matt, wondering just how he looked, laying there with his knees bent, his wrists tied over his head, his skin flushed and his eyes smoky with desire.

Matt moaned softly as he  looked down at him, then bent to kiss his stomach lightly, rubbing his chin against the tip of him playfully, before ducking a bit more to lick it. "Fuck you’re gorgeous... you're going to haunt my dreams forever..." he said softly as he ran his hands under Saffron's legs, lifting them a bit as he moved closer, pressing against him lightly as his mouth moved up to catch Saffron’s for a kiss.

Saffron whimpered softly, and raised his head enough to kiss Matt back, deep and hungry. "Why should I haunt your dreams, when you can have me any time you want..?" He replied softly, a bit breathlessly, looking up at Matt, his eyes smoky and hazy with desire, a lighter green to them then their normal dark almost black color. He raised his hips enough to rub against Matt with a soft wanton moan.

Matt gave him another soft kiss then sat back on his heels, one hand slipping beneath Saffron to lift him a bit more while his other hand guided himself into place. "You just do... I've hardly been without you at my side since we met and I can't get you out of my mind as it is... " he said softly and began to slip inside him with a moan.

Saffron moaned, arching a bit more in a way that let him slip deeper inside him. His eyes fluttered closed, and he pulled at the cord a bit. He couldn't ever remember a moment feeling like this, so very right and making him feel...so alive...so wanted.

Matt stayed kneeling as he moved inside him until Saffron’s body was accepting all of him, then set a pace a bit harder than he'd intended, but still way gentler then he'd normally do. The entire time he held Saffron's hips and watched him, the sight of his hands tied above him turning him on more then he'd care to admit. That thought only made him think of Landan and suddenly then enjoyment of it was gone. He cursed softly and moved, stretching above him to quickly untied the cord and free his hands, his mouth pressing a kiss against each wrist before he caught his mouth in a hungry kiss and thrust back fully into him again.

Saffron pulled back from the kiss with a soft gasp, looking up at Matt with a confused look as he felt the blood rushing back into his wrists and he moved his head enough to look at where the cord lay, before looking back at Matt with the same confused expression, a touch of fear in his eyes. "Why?" He asked in a whisper, though a soft moan escaped him as Matt thrust back into him and he moved his legs, wrapping them around Matt's hips. His hands still lay on the pillow above his head.

"Touch me, angel." Matt just said softly, slightly breathless as he shifted slightly, leaning forward and bracing himself above him, thrusting deeper. "Hold me.."

Saffron whimpered, his body arching against Matt's, his hips off the bed, allowing Matt to push deeper into him with each thrust bringing another moan from Saffron. None of the other men Saffron had been with had ever been Matt's size and part of Saffron thought it should hurt, but while it did in a way, it had also never felt so fantastic. He moved his hands, slipping them around Matt's shoulders and leaned up, catching his lips, kissing him passionately, while his fingers already curled into Matt's shoulders, his nails scratching lightly.

Matt kissed him back harder, letting go of everything but enough thought to hold his shields in place and prevent another zombie horde from knocking on their door. His pace increased to the point the heavy bed was moving along with them, the headboard banging steadily against the wall. "Mark me..." he broke the kiss to growl softly in Saffron’s ears. "Don’t be afraid of it.."

Saffron was gasping for a breath by then, his own body moving with Matt's and had a feeling he was going to be a bit sore later but he didn't care. He'd never experienced sex like this, and he moaned, his head thrown back against the pillows for the moment as he struggled to catch his breath. His nails dug into Matt's shoulder blades, scratching as he drew his nails long and slow, in deep scratches. Part of him hoped he didn't draw blood. "Matt..." He moaned, more vocal then he could ever remember in bed. He raised his head, looking up at Matt, his eyes smoky with desire, before he leaned forward, kissing and nuzzling Matt's neck, nipping gently. He could feel himself nearing the climax, fast and hard, more intense then the last time.

 Matt moaned at the feel of Saffron’s nails, his eyes closed  as he felt himself nearing the brink. "Harder, baby." he gasped. "Please... I want you to..." he said, his eyes opening as he looked down at him. "I'm right there, baby.... take me over the edge.." he whispered with another hard kiss.

Saffron gasped behind the kiss, feeling himself inching closer to orgasm with every hard intense thrust. He didn't want to hurt Matt, and he was afraid he would if he let his nails dig any more, but he didn't have a chance. "Oh gods... Matt!" He cried, arching against him, his nails digging hard and deep drawing long red welts across Matt's shoulders as the orgasm hit him, his body spasming, tightening around Matt as he came.

Matt gave a shout as his orgasm ripped through him, his head thrown back as he gave a few final thrusts before he collapsed breathless on top of him. "Holy fuck..." he whispered after a few minutes, finding the strength to wrap his arms around Saffron and hold him tight, burrowing his face into Saffron's hair. "That was... that... holy fuck.." he repeated with a soft start to a laugh that died for lack of breath.

Saffron whimpered softly, before he wiggled enough to get out from under Matt. "I didn't hurt you, did I?!" He asked softly, a bit panicked, the fear obvious in his eyes. He actually moved to be able to see Matt's back, the long dark red scratches visible in the fire light.

"Hmm... fuck no... felt wonderful..." Matt said softly. "Told you, baby... when things would get a bit rough during sex... it was always reciprocated. I like getting it rough just as much as giving it... maybe a bit more than..." he admitted with a bit of a blush, laying one his stomach for the moment. "Maybe one day you'll be brave enough to try tying me up.." he added with a soft breathless  chuckle."

Saffron blushed darkly, but moved, laying against Matt while he lay on his stomach. He let his finger tips brush gently and lovingly over the scratches. He shook his head slightly. "I'm not good at taking charge during sex...unless I'm drunk... but that got me in trouble after wards..." He said softly. "And you weren't being rough..." He lied softly. Now in the afterglow, he realized he was sore from the hard and rough pace, but in a way to him, it was more then worth it.

Matt snorted softly, folding his arms beneath his head and letting his eyes close. "Yeah I was... wasn't planning on it.. but.. you said I could be 'crueler'... I.. I just... Sorry... got carried away..." he finished with a blush, loving the feel of Saffron’s light touch on his back.

Saffron let his fingers trace over the tattoo Matt had on his back shoulder, and sighed softly. His lower body was stretched out beside Matt, and he was leaning against his back, his arms crossed under him. There was something peaceful and enduring about the moment, with the only sound for the moment the crackling of the fire. "You weren't being crueler..." Saffron answered softly. "Really, you weren't...I'm fine..." He added softly, but seriously, leaning down to kiss one of the scratches, he thought he noticed they weren't as red. "But...you didn't have to untie me..."

Matt smirked softly, content to stay where he was for the moment. "You say that now... wait until you try to walk... then tell me I wasn't too rough...." he said then opened his eyes and looked at him. "And of course I had to untie you... you couldn't have done this with your hands tied."

Saffron blushed even more, but shook his head. "I'm fine..." He replied in a soft, almost unheard tone. He looked up at Matt where he lay. "But...I asked you to tie me up..." He whispered, still blushing.

Matt frowned slightly and pushed himself up on his elbows, enjoying the remaining sting to the scratches as he moved. "What are saying, angel?" he asked softly, turning his head to look at him. "Are you saying you didn't want me to untie you? " he asked. "Or that you didn't want to scratch me?"

Saffron wondered if he'd stop blushing any time soon. He moved, sitting up beside Matt, grabbing a pillow to hold in his lap as he crossed his legs under him. His teddy bear was in his bag, by the door. He watched the fire burning for a moment. "I... I asked you to tie me up...I...wanted to try...with you... to get over my fear...of being tied up..." He trailed off a moment, he had so much more to say on that, but didn't know how, then shook his head. "And I didn't want to hurt you... scratching you...I didn't want to scratch you too hard...I didn't...want...you mad..."

Matt groaned softly and pushed himself to his knees, kneeling beside him. "Saffron... you didn't make me mad. I asked you to, remember? I wanted you to hurt me... " he said softly, then leaned down to kiss his cheek softly. "I enjoy a bit of pain with sex... especially if I'm giving a bit to whom I'm with. Tying you up... " he shook his head softly. "You did get over it... I watched you, angel... I felt the tension and fear drain out of you... I gave you what you wanted.... So I untied you and asked for what I wanted... is that so wrong?"

Saffron scrunched up his nose a moment, he hadn't decided if his fear was gone or not. He had the feeling it wasn't, and wouldn't ever leave, but at least he had that moment with Matt where it hadn't been there. He looked up at him though, wide eyed. "You wanted it... it’s your right..." He replied softly. "I'll do what ever you want..."

Matt sighed heavily then smirked softly. "Angel... " he shook his head and smiled softly, dropping back down  and stretching out on his back. "Never mind. You want me to, I'll gladly tie you up again some time... For sex this good? Hell yeah... but you gotta return the favor, angel... alright?"

Saffron raised his head, from where his chin was resting on the pillow, he'd been lost in thought a moment. He looked at Matt confused a moment. "I just told you, I'd do what ever you wanted..." He replied softly, watching him.

Matt reached out and caught a lock of Saffron’s hair, toying with it. "But you don’t want to." he said softly then sighed. "Never mind, angel... it's alright. I'll make due until you're ready for that. Maybe I'll piss you off one day and you'll enjoy it then..." he added with a smirk.

Saffron looked at him again, still confused. "That's not true..." He whispered after a moment, pulling away from his touch, not sure why he was suddenly hurt by what Matt said. "I never said I don't want to... that's not true..." He suddenly moved, tossing the pillow back toward the head of the bed and crawling off it, heading for his bag. The death elemental in him was starting to go on the defensive and he wasn't sure why.

"Saff..." Matt called after him. "It's alright. I understand... you don’t want to hurt me... I don’t want to hurt you either, baby. It's just that... sometimes I like to be hurt a bit during sex. Nothing big... few scratches, maybe a slap or two... little shit like that is good enough. I'm not asking you to break out the whips and chains and shit..." he said with a soft laugh and rolled onto his side to watch him. "Fuck,. I wouldn’t want you to. Really... it's not that big a deal."

Saffron snorted as he dug through his bag and found a change of clothes, grabbing a night gown and pair of silk boy legs. He slipped the boylegs on, before standing. "I'd certainly break out the whips if you really wanted me to." The death elemental replied, as he pulled on the short night gown. He ran his fingers through his hair a moment, before moving from his bag, moving to stand before the fireplace. "I told you, Matt...I've never had a boyfriend. I've never been in love like this. I've had two masters and plenty of clients... I'm a slave, prostitute and whore, I don't know how to be with one who really wants me...who loves me..." He said in a soft tone, watching the fire. A resurgence of the storm had him trembling, but he didn't move, merely stood where he was watching the fire and trembling.

Matt watched him, frowning slightly then sighed and slipped out of bed, going to his side. "I'm sorry... I didn’t mean to upset you." he said softly. "I know you've had a shitty life.. especially when it comes to sex. And to you, pain is not something that can be enjoyed." He gave a slight shrug. "I was a bit luckier when it came to sex... was only raped once... well twice if you count that it was two guys at once, but I got even. And I don’t know why I hated the pain then during the sex but I enjoy it now... maybe because it makes me feel alive..." he gave another shrug. "Look... what I'm saying is... I want you to be comfortable... and if you're not comfortable with that then... it's okay..."

Saffron winced at the mention of rape, his mind wondering back to his life in the Black Court, but he shook his head, keeping his gaze on the fire, flinching at the loud crack of thunder. "Its not okay..." He answered in a whisper. He noticed he wasn't as sore as he had been, but really didn't pay attention to that. "I didn't want you untying me...I wanted to stay tied up..." He had no idea how to explain anything in his head and it was frustrating him more then he had ever been. "I...I wanted you... to...to hurt me..." He whispered, still not looking at Matt, the tears slipping silently down his cheeks.

Matt stood frozen in shock. "What?" he finally asked. "But... why? You... you don't enjoy that... You've spent your whole life being hurt.. why...?" Matt closed the distance between then and brushed the tears from his cheeks. "Why?" he asked again.

Saffron looked up at Matt, staring at him a moment, as a few more tears fell. "I don't...know..." He replied in a whisper. "But I did... because...it was you..." He shook his head, looking away back at the fire, his arms crossed over his chest. "And the want is still there..."

Matt slipped his arms around him, pulling him close. He buried his face in Saffron’s hair and just hugged him tightly. "I love you. I never want to hurt you." he said softly. "But... if it's something you need a bit of during sex... that I can handle." he said. "If you're sure."

Saffron let him pull him into his arms, but he didn't respond, his arms still crossed over his chest. He was still frustrated, confused and scared. He didn't know what to make of his own feelings and he had no idea what to make of the rest of it. And the storm wasn't helping.

Matt sighed heavily when Saffron didn’t respond. "So you're pissed because I untied you?" he asked. "Fine." he said, then grabbing him and tossing him over his shoulder. In two large steps, he tossed Saffron back down onto the bed and had him pinned before he scramble off the bed again. "Fine... then I'll tie you back up for as long as you can stand." he said simply. "Will that be better?"

Saffron looked up in surprise, at finding himself pinned back to the bed. The submissive in him told him to tell Matt he was fine, not to bother with it, that there wasn't any point. The death elemental on the other...Saffron's eyes flashed as the death elemental seemed surface. "Maybe it will." He replied softly, but a bit tartly.

Matt snorted and shifted to keep him pinned while he grabbed the cord from where it lay. He pulled Saffron’s wrists together, binding them tightly, then pulled them over his head and fastened the cord back in place. "There." he said simply, still straddling his chest. He blushed slightly as he realized Saffron couldn't help but notice he was getting a bit turned on again by it all. With a soft moan, he moved off of him, grabbing the blankets and pulling them out from beneath him, then pulling them back over him again. He left him there for the moment, and went to blow out the candles and make sure the fire screen was in place, then slipped into bed beside him and cuddled close. He tucked one arm under his head, so his cheek was pressed against the side of Saffron's chest, then slipped the other hand beneath the night gown to rest on his bare stomach. "Sweet dreams, Saffron." he said with a soft smirk.

Saffron was left speechless, finding himself laying there, with his wrists tied a little tighter then before and only the fire light, lighting the room. And Matt intending on going to sleep. He supposed he asked for it...literally. A small part of him found it amusing. He tugged on his wrists, and winced slightly as the cord tightened with the tug. He hadn't failed to notice that Matt had gotten a bit turned on by having him tied up again and decided to use that to his advantage, squirming slightly, his lower body rubbing against Matt and he whimpered softly. There was a sudden very bright and close flash of lightning, Saffron tensed a moment, before a booming crack of thunder rolled over head, causing Saffron buck and twist with a started soft cry, pulling at the cord with both hands enough that the headboard thudded against the wall. And yet it left his heart pounding with both fear and type of excitement he'd never felt before.

Matt shifted closer, slipping both arms around him, the one going under his head and shoulders. "Shh.. it's alright baby... I'm right here..." he said softly, his lips pressing a gentle kiss to the night gown covering Saffron’s chest. "I won’t let anything happen to you.... you're mine now, angel.. it's alright.."

Saffron whimpered, squirming a bit more against Matt. "I hate storms..." He whispered, tugging slightly at the cord. He opened his eyes, looking at Matt imploring. "Distract me...please...until it stops..." He begged in a whisper, letting his body rub against Matt's. He didn't want to be untied, he just wanted to forget about the storm...and everything else.

"Distract you, huh?" he asked lightly as he let his hand slip down to stroke Saffron's stomach. "I don't know... every thing I do, you seem to be against." he said softly, his tone teasing as his fingers circled Saffron’s belly button. "You keep telling me that I 'don’t have to' when I try something to make you feel good... and when I try something to make me feel good.. you get all pissy with me." he added, letting his fingers slip lower until they brushed along the length of him. "That’s why you're tied up again... remember?"

Saffron squirmed a bit more, with another whimper, flinching at another crash of thunder, but he looked up at Matt, his eyes slightly wide and desperate. "Please Matt..." He whispered. "I'll behave...you can do what you want...how you want...I won’t complain..." He added, begging. He gave a soft cry wincing as the next crash of the thunder seemed to shake the windows.

Matt let his hand close around him, giving a gentle squeeze as he nuzzled and kissed Saffron's neck. "Anything I want, hmm?" he asked softly, stroking him between light teasing squeezes. "That's a lie..." he said softly. "You'll complain if I untie you… so I can't do 'anything' I want...  just 'anything' that keeps you tied up... right?" he asked softly, his lips brushing over Saffron’s neck as he spoke.

Saffron struggled to catch his breath, squirming and wiggling slightly against him. He didn't want to be untied. "Please Matt...anything with me tied up..." He whispered. He wasn't sure he could ever explain WHY he wanted to stay tied up right then, but he did.

Matt let go of him, pulling away and getting to his knees beside him. He looked down at him, then smirked softly. "Alright... but you asked for it...." he said simply. "And I'll warn you right now... I've already caught you in a lie. Now, you said I can do anything I want with you tied up, so if you complain now or tell me to stop... I'll have to punish you..." he said with a wicked smirk. "Understand?"

Saffron flinched at another crash of thunder, but eyed Matt, before nodding. "Yus...I understand..." He muttered, a bit frustrated, but more upset by the storm which seemed at it's height, raging outside, rattling the windows and pelting heavy rain.

Matt smirked even more as he leaned down to kiss Saffron's stomach, his hands stroking his ribs lightly for a moment. Another crash of thunder rattled the windows and Matt sat back on his heels, took hold of Saffron’s foot and tickled it.

Saffron gasped softly, squirming more and instinctively attempted to pull his foot away, a nervous giggle escaping him, before he reminded himself he'd told Matt he could do what ever he wanted and that included this. Biting his lip rather hard, he managed to leave his foot in Matt's hands, despite wanting to pull away.

Matt's eyes sparkled as he stopped tickling and lifted the foot to kiss it lightly, before letting his hands stroke up the length of Saffron’s leg. He slipped his hand beneath him, cupping his balls gently as he leaned down to press a kiss at the base of his shaft, watching it twitch at the touch. "Want me to stop?" he asked lightly.

Saffron bit his lip rather hard, struggling with himself internally. Part of him wanted to tell Matt to stop, not to do that, but he had told Matt he could do what ever he wanted with Saffron tied up, and he didn't want to make him mad by retracting that. He shook his head, not trusting himself to open his mouth, though a soft moan escaped him.

Matt chuckled softly as he gave another soft kiss, his fingers slipping down to brush over his entrance teasingly. Saffron pushed against his fingers and he pulled them away with a chuckle, his hands slipping over his sides, holding his waist a moment as he gave one more kiss. "You deny me my pleasure by keeping your hands to yourself..." he said softly, still smirking. "So I'll just have to see that you enjoy yourself enough for both of us..." he added, his eyes sparkling brightly as he sat back on his heels and began tickling his sides.

Saffron gave another soft cry, gasping as he squirmed in either direction, unable to keep from giggling softly at being tickled and couldn't very well remember ever being tickled before. "Wasn't...wasn't... denying...you... pleasure..." He managed to gasp, still giggling.

"Yes you are.." Matt replied, grinning as he continued to tickle him, enjoying the sound of the few giggles that escaped. "I want your nailed biting into me… I want you to give me some bit of pain when I cum... but you won’t let me have that..." he added, moving to pin Saffron's legs together with his own so he couldn’t twist too far out of his way.

Saffron gasped for a breath, between more soft giggles and gave a soft frustrated cry at not being able to get away from Matt's tickling. "You...you d-d-didn't tell me...that’s what...you wanted!" He replied breathlessly, pulling a bit at the cord, wincing as it tightened slightly about his wrists.

"Yes I did.. I told you why I untied you last time.. I told you how much I enjoyed it... You got all pissy, remember? And this time, you won’t let me untie you...." he said, not relenting in his torture.

"I wasn't pissy!" Saffron replied, something about his tone more hurt then anything else and gave another cry at a booming crack of thunder that sounded directly overhead.

Matt stopped his tickling and released his legs, moving between them and leaning down to kiss him softly, his eyes sparkling. " You're cute when you get all pissy... your eyes flash and your cheeks get flushed..." he said with a soft chuckle.

Saffron's eyes flashed again as he gave Matt a look, though he was blushing darkly. A faint whimper escaped him as he leaned up, kissing Matt back, his body arching off the bed slightly, pressing against Matt.

Matt smiled as he let Saffron kiss him a moment then pulled away, sitting back on his heels again as he let his hands stroke idly over his body. "And you're fucking adorable when you blush... " he added. "And you have the cutest fucking giggle I've ever heard..." he said, tickling him a bit more.

Saffron gasped, giggling more, unable to keep from doing so as Matt tickled him, but in some way, he'd forgotten about the storm and everything else, find himself enjoying the moment, unlike anything else he'd known.

The sound of Saffron’s giggles, and the fact that he was no longer jumping at every boom of thunder, brought an even bigger smile to Matt's face. "Fuck you're beautiful.." he said softly, then gathered his courage and leaned down to kiss the length of Saffron's shaft, feeling it harden beneath his lips. He slid his hands around to hold his back side as he closed his eyes, and continued letting his lips and tongue brush over every inch of him.

Saffron gasped, arching slightly off the bed. He'd been struggling to catch his breath from the round of giggles and Matt simply stole it away again. He moaned softly, his eyes fluttered closed, and squirmed just a bit. "Matt..." He whimpered.

Matt slipped one hand free to take hold of him as he kissed the tip of him, his gaze slipping up to watch Saffron as well as he could. "I love you, baby." he said softly before gathering his final bit of nerve and closing his mouth around him.

Saffron gave a soft cry, bucking slightly against him, the sensations unlike anything he'd ever felt before. He couldn't believe how fantastic it felt and realized it must have been why all the men liked making him go down on them.

Matt hesitantly at first let his tongue slip over him, sucking lightly as he moved, letting him slip almost out of his mouth before taking him back in again. No bad memories threatened and he relaxed  a bit more.

Saffron whimpered, squirming a bit more. His hips came off the bed with each of Matt's moves and he tugged a bit more on the cord with a frustrated moan, half a mind to tell Matt to stop but he bit his tongue for now.

Matt slid the fingers of one hand beneath him, probing teasingly as he continued to torment him, every moan and whimper from Saffron making him harder.

Saffron could already feel the orgasm building and whimpered, squirming against Matt, part of him wanting to pull away. "Ooh...Matt...please..." He moaned softly, not sure how much more he could take.

Matt looked up at him as he slid two fingers inside him as deep as they could go, and lifted his head. "Please what?" he asked softly, one hand stroking Saffron’s erection steadily while he fingered him.

Saffron's hips bucked, pushing back against Matt's fingers as they came off the bed. "Please Matt..." He moaned, forcing himself to look down at Matt. "Don't tease...I want...I want you..." He whimpered, feeling the orgasm coming closer.

Matt smirked wickedly, his eyes sparkling as he shook his head. "Tsk tsk tsk..." he said softly, his fingers still at work. "You said I could do anything I wanted Saffron... and now you're telling me I can't... again..." he added, bending down to kiss his stomach lightly before pulling both hands free and grabbing his hips. "You know what that means..." he said, moving back and suddenly lifting Saffron and flipping him over onto his stomach. He leaned down and kissed the back of his neck, growling softly into his ear as he let his hand slid over his back and give a sudden sharp slap to Saffron’s back side. "I have to punish you..." he said, his hand rubbing over the red mark his hand had left behind.

Saffron gave a soft cry at the slap, surprised at find himself on his stomach and he struggled a moment. But he didn't pull away from Matt and a soft moan escaped him as he managed raise up slightly.

Hearing that soft moan, Matt smiled softly and gave Saffron's back side another slap as he continued to kiss his neck. Between each slap he rubbed the sting away then finally gave a low moan. "Fuck... gods I can't take anymore..." he growled softly as he moved behind him and grabbed his waist again, lifting him onto his knees. He slipped an arm around him, holding him up for a moment. "Lean on your elbows, angel...Either that or I can move you up a bit and you can lean on the head board..." he said, his free hand rubbing one reddened cheek as he spoke.

Saffron whimpered softly, before squirming slightly, moving. There was enough slack on the cord that he was able to raise up more on both his knees and elbows, though not on elbows by much, leaning down more that way, staying on his knees.

Matt gave Saffron’s backside one more slap, although not as hard as earlier then leaned down to kiss each cheek softly. "Think now that I've made sure you won’t be sitting comfortably for a while... I should finish off making sure you can't walk either..." he said in a soft growl as he quickly guided himself inside. Part of him was shocked at how much he was enjoying himself... he'd never thought he'd be able to be this way with Saffron knowing what he'd been through... but part of him was still a bit ticked at telling Saffron how much he loved his nails... and Saffron denying him that this time.

Saffron found himself tugging slightly on the cord, as he leaned on his arms and for a moment, buried his face in the pillow under him, moaning softly. He submitted to Matt, letting him control everything. While it mirrored some of his memories, there was nothing that really reminded him of the cruelty or fear of those memories...

Matt let his hands wrap around Saffron’s hips as he moved, a few long deep stroked before picking up the pace and resuming the same hard and fast pace from before. Part of him was telling him to slow down and take it easier, but he was too worked up to pay it much attention.

Saffron gave a soft cry at the hard and fast pace, gasping for a breath, before burying his face in the pillow, tugging hard on the cord. The tugging caused the cord to tighten around his wrists, causing the rope burn and breaking the skin. Saffron cried out in pain from that, moving his arms so the cord wasn't tight, half laying but able to stay on his knees.

Matt had his eyes closed as he moved, his head thrown back as he felt his orgasm building just as hard and fast as before. His concentration was divided between keeping the power surge safely inside his shields... and bringing more moans and whimpers from Saffron.

Saffron struggled, another soft cry escaping him at the hard pace, but he moaned Matt's name as he felt the orgasm building fast and intense. The cord still rubbed against his wrists, but he didn't seem to notice the pain very much. He gasped for a breath, before giving another cry as he came, just as the door to the bed room slammed open.

Matt lost control as the door slammed open and a blast of power slammed into him, knocking him away from Saffron. He gave a growling shout as he scrambled to his feet, ready for a fight, the power rush filling him. The sight of his father standing beside the bed looking furious brought him to a stop. "Dad?! What the fuck..?"

"I could ask you the same damned question." Rin snarled, his eyes shining with fury. "What the fuck are you doing, Mattias?!" Saffron had tumbled over with a soft cry, still bound by the cord, his wrists raw. He looked up, terrified, more at having Rin bust in on them then anything else. Rin moved in one swift movement, pulling the blankets over Saffron and cutting the cord from around Saffron's wrists, but once Saffron was free, he practically scrambled into the far corner of the bed away from both of them. "Did you not listen to a damned word I said the other night?!" Rin snapped at Matt, "Or did you just figure because it was your half brother who's been keeping him for the last year and half that it'd be fine if you tied him up as well?!"

Matt felt himself go cold at that. "Get out, dad." he said softly. "You obviously know shit about me. Get the fuck out." he repeated, walking towards where Saffron huddled. "We'll get dressed and find someplace else to be."

"You're his guardian, Mattias!" Rin hissed, not sure if he was angry at Matt, or disappointed. Awen had already told him that she knew they'd slept together that morning and some how Rin wasn't surprised by that aspect of things, he'd just hoped Matt had understood where Saffron was coming from. He'd submit to another in an intimate situation, rather it hurt him or not. "Damn it, it’s not just his physical being you're responsible for, but his emotions as well!" He added, his tone soft but stressing. Saffron caught sight of Matt approach him and shied away from him, practically moving toward the middle of the bed, holding his wrists to his chest, the short night gown he was wearing getting blood on it.

"Fuck you, dad." Matt said simply. "So you've got two sons who like their sex on the rough side... wonder where they get it from?" he said coldly. "Maybe you should see if Awen takes after us too, huh? Why don’t you go bust in on her and accuse her of shit." He stopped at the side of the bed, facing his father over it and held out his hand to Saffron. "Come here, baby... it's alright... " he said softly.

Saffron shook his head wildly and didn't move, actually pressing himself against the headboard, hiding his wrists, though he attempted to pull the night gown down to cover himself. Rin clench his jaw a moment. "I came here to check on to two of you after Awen let me know Landan was leaving more disturbing gifts at your house. I get here and I hear Saffron crying out...what the fuck do you expect me to do, wait down stairs and have a cup of coffee?!" Rin snapped, but still managed to keep his voice low. "I don't care what your preferences for sex are, you should have put a little more thought in to it where Saffron is concerned!" Saffron flinched and actually tried to make himself smaller. "He submits, Mattias, because that's been beat into him. You could be as rough with him as you wanted and he'd allow you to and never say it hurt him."

"He asked, dad." Matt said softly. "He asked me to tie him up. Hell... he got mad at me the first time because I untied him." he said with a snort. "He doesn't do whatever he's told to do... I've asked him and he's refused. And he's asked me to stop ... so obviously you don’t know everything." he added. "I might have gotten a bit carried away, but it was because it was what he wanted... what he asked from me." He drew a breath and looked away form Rin, sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to him. "I'm not Landan, dad. Get out now... Saffron freaked bad enough the last time he saw you... having you bust in on us having sex hasn't made this time any better... Leave so I can calm him down... and get some clothes on." he said softly.

Rin watched Matt as much as he did Saffron for a moment, before shaking his head. "I know you're not Landan." Rin answered softly, before turning to head for the door. "But you need to think twice about things with Saffron...he's more fragile then you think." He replied simply, looking at Saffron a moment, who actually looked up at him wide eyed. Rin sighed, before turning and leaving the room.

"Wait...Rin..." Saffron moved, attempting to scramble off the bed to go after his former tutor, but Rin had already left, closing the door behind him and Saffron got tangled in the blankets, tripping and falling on the floor on the other side of the bed with a soft frustrated cry.

"Saffron..."Matt said softly as he moved to help him up, only then noticing the blood. "Oh shit... oh... damn it... I hurt you. I mean.. I REALLY hurt you! No wonder dad was pissed..." he said softly. "Fuck... baby I'm sorry... That’s it.. no more games. I don’t give a shit how fantastic it can be... no more."

Saffron struggled to undo himself from the covers, but looked up at Matt wide eyed, a little afraid even. "What...what do you mean...?" He asked in a whisper. He shook his head. "Didn't hurt me...wrists are my fault..." He added, before looking at Matt again. "You don't want me any more?" He asked in a whisper, the tears building his eyes.

Matt paused and sighed, reaching out to help pull the blanket away from him. "Of course I still want you, angel." he said softly. "I want you forever." he added, pausing to stroke his cheek tenderly. "But I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to tie you up anymore... " he said softly, catching hold of Saffron’s wrist and kissing the bloody welt. "I don’t ever want to see you bleeding again..."

Saffron kicked the blanket once he was free of it and looked at his wrists a moment. He shook his head. "You didn't hurt me...I mean...you did...but...I wanted you to hurt me...I told you that..." He added softly, but seriously, looking up at Matt with a sad expression, a few of the tears that had gathered in his eyes, falling finally. He sat there for a moment, before managing to scramble to his feet. "I have to go tell Rin that...it wasn't your fault...he shouldn't be mad at you!" He found himself slightly unsteady on his feet and wasn't sure why, though he noticed a faint pain in his thighs.

Matt caught hold of him and lifted him into his arms. "No, baby. You don’t have to tell him anything." he said, setting him down on the bed. "And certainly not dressed in nothing but a bloody night gown with me buck naked." he said with a weak smirk. He scooped Saffron’s under pants up off the floor and handed them to him, then moved to grab his bag for him. "Here... find something to pull on. I'm going to get some pants on, alright?"

Saffron wasn't entirely sure he could even face Rin, not just because he'd busted in on them at the most embarrassing moment, but...well with everything else. But he didn't want Rin mad at his son, just because Saffron had wanted to be hurt by Matt. It took Saffron a moment as he pulled on his silk boylegs, to realize why he'd wanted Matt to physically hurt him. "I didn't want you to break my heart..." Saffron whispered, almost unheard as he managed to pull of the bloody nightgown and looked at his wrists. "Landan did that...as well as constantly hurt me physically. I thought....I thought if I... I got you to hurt me physically...we could just get that out of the way and not have to worry about it... and...you wouldn't feel the need to break my heart..." He whispered in the same almost unheard tone and didn't look at Matt. "I thought...if... if you physically hurt me.. .and were...satisfied with that...you could...keep hurting me physically...and there'd be no need to break my heart..."

Matt stood frozen, his eyes closed as he listened to him then turned and caught hold of him, lifting him into his arms and holding him tight. "I'll never break your heart, Saffron.... and I'm never hurting you again." he said softly, sitting down and pulling Saffron onto his lap, cradling him close. "I love you. Fuck... damn it I hate it when dad's right... I don't know what I'm doing with you and now I've fucked it up and hurt you... and... damn it, angel..." he whispered, burying his face in Saffron’s hair. "This makes me feel like I'm turning into my fucking brother..." he added in a soft mutter.

Saffron shook his head furiously, moving enough to taking Matt's face in his hands, and making him look at him. "I asked you to...I made you do it... its not your fault... you're still nothing like Landan... I'm the one that got the cord off the curtains...I'm the one who asked you to do it in the first place...you didn't tie me up first thing and force me on my knees...Please Matt...you're NOT like Landan..." Saffron whispered, the agony in his tone. He kissed Matt softly. "I've fallen in love with you...deeper then I have any one else in my life...and...you're all I have now. I have no family...and no one else has loved me...like you say you do. I know I'm all fucked up and don't understand anything, and I know I was your half brother's whore and play thing, among other men's...but please don't leave me by myself...and please don't stop wanting me, Matt..."

Matt slipped his arms around him tighter, hugging him. "I won't leave you, Saffron, and I'll never stop wanting you." he said softly. "But... I'm obviously not what you need when it comes to sex. I'll try harder. I don’t want you to hurt.... and I'm so sick right now because... I hurt you... and I really enjoyed it... I don’t want to be like that..."

Saffron looked at him, confused. "But I just told you, Matt...I WANTED you too...I asked for it!" He stressed softly, not understanding why Matt would be furious at himself for something Saffron had begged him for. "I'll be good from now on...I won’t ask you tie me up...." He added earnestly. A soft knock came to the door, before Rin opened it, but he remained in the door way. "I can't stay much longer. I called your sister and let her know the two of you are fine, other then the storm. Remain here, for a while longer, Mattias, until I can find a way to break Landan's link through the scars. Awen told me about that earlier. This place is shielded against that." He said, his voice calmly, though he eyed the two of them wearily, the worry obvious for a moment. Saffron had started to scramble off Matt's lap at Rin’s appearance, to hide behind Matt.

Matt tightened his hold on Saffron, slightly and kissed his hair. "Sh.. it's alright, baby." he whispered softly before looking around at Rin. "I'm sorry dad. I swear.... I... I'll be more careful with him." he finally said. "I love him... I really do. I never meant to hurt him like that. I was just.... he asked..."

Rin eyed the two of them for a moment, considering his words carefully. "I did!" Saffron squeaked. "I wanted him to...I..." Saffron trailed off, blushing darkly.

Rin sighed. "You wanted him to hurt you because it's all you know...I know." Rin answered softly, watching Saffron blushed even darker, but nod. "If you love him, Mattias, truly love him, you'll have to show him what love really is...that its not abuse and torture like its been beat into him. I'm sure he's already told you... he needs to be dominated...and claimed...and that's true... but claim and dominate him out of love, Mattias...you'll be more happy with the results if you do..."

Matt snorted softly as he held Saffron, kissing the top of his hair. "I thought I was doing that... none of it was meant to be... I mean..." he sighed and rested his cheek on top of Saffron’s head and gave his father a rather sad look. "Nothing I've done to him was out of anything BUT love, dad. Maybe I got a bit carried away... but... I'm trying. I don’t want to be like Landan... "

Rin shook his head, before looking at Matt. "You won’t be..." He said simply. He turned to leave. "I can't stay, there's still a lot I need to do." He added. "And you both should get some rest." Saffron bit his lip, he wanted to say something in reply, but nothing came to him.

"I'm sorry dad." Matt repeated softly. Apologizing wasn't something he did very often, but then neither were long conversations with his father. "Hey dad?" he called after him as Rin started to leave. "I promise the next time you drop in... we'll be more prepared for company..." he offered with a slight blush and smirk.

Rin snorted softly, but smirked faintly and glanced back at them. "We'll see." He replied simply, before leaving.

Saffron sighed softly, watching him go, before snuggling against Matt a moment. "That was...very embarrassing..." Saffron muttered softly.

Matt snorted softly at Saffron’s comment, smirking, then laughed and kissed the top of his head. "Yeah... fuck I really hope he doesn’t mention it to my sister or I'll never hear the end of it... I'll be getting nailed with sex jokes until the end of time..." he said then sighed heavily and hugged him closer. "I'm sorry I got carried away... and that I didn't understand...."

Saffron shook his head slightly, noticed the storm had settled some and sighed softly. "I suppose he was right, should probably get some rest…it's been rather crazy the last couple days..." He said softly, looking up at Matt.

Matt nodded and kissed him softly. "Yeah... plus I've probably wore you out. Get out of this gown... I'll buy you a new one." he said softly, his fingers brushing over the blood spots that marred the fabric. "You have another one? Or should I grab you one of my shirts?"

Saffron slipped from Matt, taking off the ruined nightgown. He glanced toward his bag, knowing he had another one, but the idea of sleeping in one of Matt's shirts appealed to him. "You can grab me one of your shirts if you want..."

Matt smiled softly as he watched him a moment, then stood and went to his bag. "I want." he said simply as he dug out one of the few he had that weren't plain; Awen's attempts at 'jazzing up' his wardrobe. It was one of the ones he actually wore since at first glance it looked like a plain black tee... it wasn't until the light hit it that you saw the dark red image of the grim reaper grinning out at you. He turned and just looked at Saffron standing int the firelight a moment before handing it to him. "Although it seems a shame to cover that beautiful body up..."

"If you'd rather me not wear anything to sleep in..." Saffron replied, leaving that hang as he took the shirt, before slipping it on, which really was too big for him, falling off one shoulder, but he didn't care.

Matt smirked softly. "Maybe when it's warmer. I think you look really damned cute in my shirt... maybe we should just skip the night gowns and you can just share my t-shirt drawer...?" he said with a smile, brushing his fingers over Saffron's cheek.

Saffron snorted softly with a slight smirk as he looked up at him. "I really don't mind wearing your t-shirts to sleep in..." He replied softly. "Don't think I've ever slept any one's t-shirt before..." He added, attempting to pull the shoulder up, even though it fell right back down.

Matt caught Saffron's hand and kissed it lightly before bending down to kiss the bare shoulder as well. "If you're comfortable, you're welcome to wear them. We'll buy you a new night gown anyhow..." he added them sighed. "Go on... get in bed. We'll be lazy and snuggle up and recover from the mind blowing sex..."

Saffron snorted softly, before slipping away from Matt and over to the bed, shoving the covers back before crawling into bed and snuggling under the covers for the moment. He turned onto his side, waiting for Matt.

Matt knelt on the bed a moment and finished pulling the remains of the cord from the headboard then tossed it away and slipped beneath the covers. He cuddled up close behind Saffron, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close. "No more pain, angel. I don’t want to ever hurt you..." he said then kissed his neck. "Speaking of which... how's your ass?" he asked with a weary smirk.

Saffron snorted softly, but now that he thought about it, he wasn't really feeling any pain period. "I'm fine...really... nothing hurts.." He replied softly, before raising a hand touching the lip he'd been biting enough to make bleed early and noticed it was heal. "Don't hurt at all..."

Matt kissed the bare shoulder, his fingers stroking Saffron’s chest through the shirt as he held him "Promise?" he asked as he lay his head back down, breathing in the scent of Saffron's hair. "No lies between us, angel..."

"No...it’s true...I don't..." Saffron said honestly, before turning over to face Matt, looking up at him. "Even my lip is healed..." he added softly. He suddenly moved as a thought came to him and sat up enough to lean over Matt, looking at his back. "And you don't have any scratches..."

Matt raised an eyebrow at that, realizing then that he didn't feel the sting anymore. He reached one hand back to touch his shoulder blade where he knew there'd been a fairly deep one. "Huh. Not sure if I'm happy about that or not..." he said softly as he pulled Saffron back into his arms and kissed him quickly. "I'm happy for you though... alleviates some of my guilt over you not being able to sit down.... or walk... I was way too rough on you, considering what you've been through. If you were any one else, I'd say I wasn't rough enough, but you? " he sighed and kissed the tip of Saffron’s nose lightly.

"I've never been around any one who could heal me from just being close..." Saffron replied softly, snuggling against Matt. "Just wonder if that's because you’re my guardian...or something else..." He added. He sighed, and shook his head slightly. "Matt... you may have been rough, but you were no were near as bad as the others..." He said softly.

Matt snorted softly at that. "I know that... but I wanted things to be different for you... better. I wanted you to experience sex the way it should be... not being a 'thing' or a toy... and what do I do? Tie you up and use you... even if it was at your request..." he sighed again, smiling softly. "At least I did a good job up until I got carried away... " he said, his eyes sparkling. "Any complaints? Or requests for next time?"

Saffron snorted softly, before snuggling closer. "No complaints...none at all...as for requests...I'll think about it for next time..." He replied softly with a smirk, before leaning up to kiss him softly. "Please don't keep beating yourself up over it, Matt... I don't mind that you got carried away...it was still better then it ever felt before..."

Matt wrapped his arms around him tighter and pressed his cheek to the top of his head. "Should've been better then ever before.... without any pain." he said softly. "You should get to know what it can be like without hurting..."

"There’s next time, isn't there?" Saffron asked softly, stifling a yawn as he snuggled against Matt. "You can show me next time... After all, I'm your girlfriend now..." Saffron added, curling a lock of Matt's hair around his fingers.

Matt smiled softly. "Yes you are." he said quietly. "Sweet dreams, angel. Wake me up when you can't sleep anymore, if I'm still sleeping... I want to be with you."

~~